“Let’s hope we keep it going.” No winning streak lasts forever, no matter how much we want it to.
“Ilya, pass the wine down this way,” Fox’s dad calls from the end of the table, where he’s sitting with Mia and Logan’s parents. “Did you see his save on Tuesday? I’m telling you, if they keep it up, these guys are headed for the playoffs this year.”
“Pops,” Fox groans loud enough to carry over the chatter, “what did I tell you? Don’t jinx us.”
“On that note…” Logan rises at the head of the table. Hannah looks up at him with that in-love gaze they’re always trading. He pulls her up to stand beside him, then tucks her into his side.
“Thanks for coming,” he says. “Hopefully, this is the first of many holidays spent with you fools.”
The room erupts in laughter and easy chirps.
“And since it’s my party,I’mallowed to steal the spotlight.” Logan shoots Fox a look.
Fox has a habit of doing that. He picked their housewarming party to announce he was the newest bachelor onYou’re The One. He shrugs, grinning. “Don’t tempt me, Lo.”
“We wanted to share some news.” Logan smiles down at Hannah as she pulls something from her pocket and slides it onto her finger. “Hannah agreed to marry me. Best Christmas present ever.”
“Whoop, whoop!” Natalie hollers, and Ada adds, “That’s right!”
Volk claps once.
Fox leans into Mia, murmuring, “I did it first,” followed by her smacking his chest playfully and then smoothing her hand over the spot.
Logan catches it. “Yeah, but I did it better.”
“You wish,” Fox fires back.
Hannah laughs. “Can we not turn our engagements into a competition?”
“Everything’s a competition with these two,” Mia huffs.
“Congratulations.” I raise my glass, and others follow. There’s a chorus of clinks before Hannah and Logan sit. “Okay, let’s eat,” Logan says, keeping his hand entwined with hers.
Logan is engaged. Fox is planning a wedding. Even Helm’s talking about more than just hooking up.
I’m happy for my friends. I really am. I just always thought I’d be one of them. Settling down. Fall in love, get married, have a family. The whole thing.
But I convinced myself I was better off alone. Safer that way. Ialmostbelieved it.
Lately, the want is too close to the surface, threatening to break free. What it might be like to come home to someone. To have a reason to rush back.
But the fear is still there, too.
Wanting something and being willing to take the risk for it aren’t the same thing. Last time I let someone in, I fucked it up—got too focused on my own career, didn’t notice her pulling away until she was already gone. What if I do it again? What if I’m stillthatguy? The one who doesn’t know how to hold onto a good thing.
My gaze drifts to the empty seat on my other side. The one Summer should be in.
“What’s Tara doing for the holidays?” Logan’s mom asks.
I take the lifeline and tell her all about the romantic trip Jim planned for them, how she’s off work until the new year.
Dinner rolls on. The heavier thoughts don’t go away, but the noise helps.
I’m finishing the last of the ham on my plate when my phone buzzes against my thigh.
I yank it out of my pocket as fast as I’d jump on a rebound, and the disappointment lands just as hard as missing one.
Summer:
