“I can’t do this without knowing we’re going to be okay.” Her breath catches.
Will we?
A month apart. Summer pretending to date Cash. Me, watching from a distance while her career takes off and mine demands everything I have.
I’m terrified, but she doesn’t need my fear on top of her own.
I pull her closer, burying my face in her hair, breathing in her sweet citrus scent. “We’re more than okay, honey.”
I want to mean it. Idomean it. I just don’t know if meaning something is enough to make it true. Yet.
We have to be okay.
The alternative—that this is the beginning of the end—is something I can’t let myself think about.
She eases away, but her hands cling to my shirt. “We’ll make it work?”
Just until you leave. That’s what we said.
But standing here, I can’t make those words mean what they used to.
I’ll doeverythingI can to make this work.
Still, it’ll be hard.
My first few seasons, I barely had time to breathe. Hockey consumed my whole life. If I hadn’t met Vanessa through the organization, I never would’ve had the chance to build anything with anyone.
And even then, what I could give wasn’t enough.
How can I expect Summer to be any different as she nurtures her career? I can’t. I don’t want her to. She deserves to give her all to it, and I’ll do whatever I have to do to ease that burden for her.
I can’t tell Summer any of that, though. Can’t tell her I’m terrified we won’t survive it. She’d stay if I asked. And I can’t let her do that.
“Of course we will.” My lips tip up, but it’s a struggle to keep them that way.
Even if we don’t make it—even right now, hurting like hell, knowing there might be worse to come in the future—I can’t bring myself to regret any of it.
Because it all led me here.
Toher.
Even if here is about to be somewhere she isn’t.
I wipe at the tears that’ve found their way onto Summer’s lashes, swallowing against the lump in my own throat.
“I don’t want to leave you.” Her voice cracks on the last word, and she pulls in a shaky breath.
Christ. I clear my throat. “But you have to.”
Because this is your dream.
And I won’t be the one who keeps you from it.
Because if you don’t, you’ll hate me for it.
And I’d rather lose you than have you hate me.
“I know.” She closes her eyes, and fresh tears spill over.
