Thankfully, he never hit me. According to my mom, he would control her with threats of violence. The acts of violence were few and far between but often enough for her to not forget how they felt.
The problem was, she had no job. She was a stay-at-home mom. He had the upper hand because he controlled the money, and her.
But then the threats, the violence, stopped when I was around one. And she said they seemed to be doing OK. They even had another baby, my younger sister. She would never regret having my sister, she’s made that clear. But it was the trigger for the violence to start again.
For whatever reason, the stress of the babies put him over the edge.
And this time, it didn’t stop.
It actually got worse. He then started to sexually assault her as well.
Turns out he also had a drug problem, used up all their money. He would get mad at my mom when they ran out of money, all because of him.
Finally, when my sister and I were eight and six, she found the courage to leave him. She moved us in with her parents until she got back on her feet. Her dad, our grandpa, was instrumental in keeping our father away from us that first year. After a while, our dad lost interest and stopped coming around.
Eventually she got him to sign divorce papers.
It took her years, but she made a great life for us.
However, it has definitely formed my opinion about men.
I have trouble trusting them. There’s no interest in a relationship because I doubt there is a guy out there worth my time.
Classic psychology study here.
I was quiet for quite a while once I finished my story, allowing it to sink in. It was cathartic finally telling it to someone, though.
Macie’s head tilted as her eyes turned down. The wetness in them didn’t surprise me. It was a sad story about my mom, I’ve cried plenty of tears over it.
She reached out, taking my hands in hers.
“I’m so sorry you guys went through that.” Sincerity laced her words. “And don’t take this the wrong way, babe. But why did you agree to Logan living here?”
That was the million-dollar question, wasn’t it?
“Well,” I said, “Lanie was quite convincing. But more importantly, if I was the only one who said no, Logan wouldn’t have been able to come back to school. That’s a lot to put on me, a lot for me to carry.”
Pulling my hands from hers, I jumped out of the bed. As I paced across the carpet, my voice increased in volume.
“Don’t you see? I couldn’t be the one to not give him the chance he worked so hard for. Yet, I feel uncomfortable with all of this.”
But I wasn’t telling her the whole truth.
I wasn’t telling her that I saw how Lanie and Xander were with him this morning. That their trust in him did help me with how I felt about Logan. More than I was willing to admit.
And I wasn’t telling her that I was one hundred percent falling for Logan Somers and how that scared the shit out of me.
CHAPTER 9
Logan
The gym was my space to zone out. To let my head open up and not think of anything. I could let it all go as I pumped the weights or ran on the treadmill, pushing myself to the limit. The music blasted in my ears and melted all the thoughts muddled in my head.
I asked Ty to join me today. We hadn’t seen much of each other since the semester started, which I was afraid of. Since we don’t live together, it was more of a challenge. He sure had time for Becca. I got it, they had a rough semester in the fall. I think they were making up for lost time.
But I missed the guy.
“Christ, man, your bench went up a shit ton since last spring,” he said as he helped me with the bar.
