“You and lover boy.”
Blinking at Varsha, she tried to sound serious. “He’s not mylover.”
“What else do you call the people you have sex with?”
Lora almost tripped over own feet. She put a hand on the railing as they descended the stairs. “First of all, there are nopeople.It’s only Eyden, and we just…never mind.”
Varsha raised her ice-blonde eyebrows. “One, why not? There are plenty of good looking men and women here. Have your pick. Two, if you didn’t hook up, then it’s no surprise you’re so caught up on him.”
“Not that I am, but why would you say that?” She was caught up on him, wasn’t she?Dammit.
“It’s unfinished business. You can’t move on until you finish—no pun intended,” Varsha explained, putting a hand on Lora’s arm, a smirk gracing her lips. “Let me spell it out: Screw the boy’s brains out, then get under someone else.”
“That’s…it’s not that easy.” According to Varsha, Lora should already be over Eyden, yet she was far from it.
“Huh.”
“‘Huh’ what?”
“Nothing.” Varsha’s golden eyes met hers, a spark making them brighter. “It’s just…you’re obviously completely in love with him.” She walked forward, leaving Lora stunned. They’d almost reached the guards’ rooms.
Lora quickened her steps, catching up. “I don’t…I’m not…in lovewith him. That’s absurd. And you barely know me, so what do you know?”
“The fact that I barely know you and can tell you have more than the hots for that boy tells you how far you’ve fallen, dear.”
“I—you’re wrong.” Lora fidgeted with the sleeve of her emerald sweater.
“If you say so.” They stopped by one of the guard’s doors. No one was around, thankfully. There were no guards watching this hallway since the rooms in this wing were for guards and servants. Varsha grinned at Lora. “One last thing before we break in.”
“Do you have another presumption about me that’s totally false?” Or maybe partly right, but absurd nonetheless?
“No,” Varsha said. The fae glanced around the hall before meeting Lora’s eyes again. “But even if you’re right and you’re not hopelessly in love with Eyden, he is definitely in love with you. And we both know you’re lying to yourself if you haven’t noticed the way he looks at you. Falea help me, you’d have to be blind to the sun.”
Denial was lying on her lips, but Lora couldn’t say it. Was he?Didshe know?
Eyden’s voice crept into her mind.Walking away from you is fucking impossible.Because he feltcommittedto keep his promise, or because he truly cared for her more than she could put into words?
Removing a hair clip from her pocket, Varsha started picking the lock. Lora was too distracted by her own mind to give Varsha an answer. She had no answers—about anything. Or maybe she did, but she couldn’t bring herself to say it, tothinkit.
The click of the lock drew Lora’s gaze back to the door. It prompted another question. Why did she keep involving Eyden in all of this?
Getting the uniform, sneaking around, gathering intel…it was abouteverythingthat was going on in both their lives. Eyden had been right about that all those weeks ago. They both cared. They both had their own reasons to risk their lives.
But he had been wrong about one thing. It was about him too.
To Lora, he meanteverything.It was a frightening thought. Her brain wanted to deny it the second the thought crossed her mind, but in a rare moment of honesty, she couldn’t find the strength to deny it.
Chapter36
Elyssa
Tarnan’s secret library turned out to be quite riveting. Amira and Elyssa had spent the last few weeks going through it, one book at a time. Amira seemed to have a system, pulling out book after book. Elyssa liked to flip through books quickly, gathering them on the floor in a useful pile and ano-one-needs-this-shitpile.
“I thought you said you were going to stop throwing books around,” Amira said, looking up from her position on the floor, an ancient book in her hand, as Elyssa tossed another useless book onto the pile. “Tarnan won’t be amused if any of them get damaged.”
“I’mcarefullythrowing them,” Elyssa replied. “My aim is always precise, if you couldn’t tell.” A small laugh rang through the air, Amira’s eyes bright. The corner of Elyssa’s mouth lifted into a smirk. “I have skilled hands. There are lots of useful things to do with one’s hands, wouldn’t you say?”
Waiting to see if the princess would take the bait, Elyssa stared right at her. It wasn’t the first time Elyssa had teased her in the last few weeks since Amira had pulled back from her that night. Was the princess simply not interested in women, inher,or was she with that Varsha girl who kept sending her letters?
