“Stop it, Amira!” Wryen’s words were forceful yet high, as if chased by something like desperation.
“It’s…I’ve tried. I’ve been good. It’s been weeks now.” Amira couldn’t fully say the words; her body felt as if it was tearing up from the inside, her heart threatening to explode.
“You have to push it back,” Wryen almost screamed. “Stop it right this minute! I can’t have a freak for a sister.” He grabbed both her arms with so much strength that she yelped. His face was a few inches from her. She could feel the burning warmth radiating from him.
“I should have ended you years ago,” Wryen spat out, his eyes wild.
“I can hide it,” Amira croaked, afraid of how far her brother would go this time.
“How?” Wryen laughed in her face, the cruelty in his eyes deafening. “The only thing that works is a good beating. That’s what I should do again. Your wedding is the one thing keeping me from taking you out.” He lifted his fist, a sinister grin on his face. In a flash, Amira saw Wryen from six years ago. The same expression was written on his face now, ready to beat her senseless, to beat her powers—her will to live—out of her.
“With fortae, the darkness disappears,” Amira cried out before his fist connected with her face.
Wryen didn’t drop his arm as he watched her. “I see.” He looked at her shaking body, the legs of her bed scratching the floor as it moved. “Doesn’t seem to be working now. Do you have a better excuse, or shall we begin?”
“I stopped taking it,” Amira rushed to say.
“Well, start again,” Wryen yelled in her face as if she was the stupidest person alive. He dropped his arm, but Amira didn’t relax one bit. “Where did you hide your pills? Don’t lie to me, I know you have some left. You’re too weak not to.” Squeezing her arm, he probably bruised it. Amira fought back tears but didn’t win.
She knew she shouldn’t tell him, but her fear won out—or maybe the longing in her forced the words out. “In my nightstand. The drawer.”
Wryen dragged her to the bed and forced her to sit. Ripping out the drawer, he quickly found the not so well hidden pill.
He looked at it with contempt before turning to Amira. “Take it.”
Amira closed her mouth, refusing to take the pill. Tears ran down her cheeks. She couldn’t go back; she would lose Tarnan’s trust—and Elyssa’s. The thought of Elyssa quickened her heartbeat. What would she think of her?
“Take the fucking pill!” Wryen yelled. With one hand, he forced her mouth open, then popped the pill in. He clenched her jaw shut, his grip unrelenting, forcing her to swallow.
The moment the pill infiltrated her system, Amira felt the incredible rush of fortae washing through her. She had forgotten how good it felt to take a full dose. Her eyes widened, and her mind mellowed pleasantly. The darkness curled back into her. Her body stopped shaking. When Wryen’s hand left her face, Amira sighed in relief.
Her brother patted her on the head. “You’re pathetic. I don’t understand what Father ever saw in you. Why he…” He stopped himself, his hand twisting a strand of Amira’s hair, pulling it. But she was too far gone to feel the pain. “If he saw you now, he would wish he’d never taken in his bastard child, never asked me to look after you. Next time I visit, I better see no trace of therealyou, or you’ll pay the price.”
Amira couldn’t even manage to reply, her mind in shambles. Finally, he left her alone in her bedroom.
A sob got stuck in her throat as Amira sat still for a moment. The high was already starting, stronger than before, but never strong enough. Tears pricked her skin, pain hollowing her out. She didn’t want to feel this, to feelcursed,doomed, forever shadowed by a monster.
No one would want an abomination such as herself by their side. Wryen had always been right; she was a freak. Nothing worth saving.
More.
Amira neededmore.
Her feet led her to Elyssa’s room. With no regard for her personal belongings, she started turning the room upside down in search of her precious pills. Where was Elyssa keeping them?
Amira tore the bedsheets from Elyssa’s bed. Throwing open the drawers of her small desk, she found notebooks and vials filled with ruby-red substances, but no sign of fortae. On instinct, Amira put her hand under the desk, searching the nooks of the wood. Her hand encountered a small pouch. With a dazed smile, she tore it away. Inside, she found her salvation.
Sinking to the ground, Amira opened the pouch. She could barely see as her eyes watered with fresh tears. Her heart hurt so much she thought she might die if she didn’t shut down all her sorrows.
She took a pill, thinking about her brother’s cruel face.
She took a second one, thinking about what her father would think of her now.
She took a third, thinking of her soon-to-be husband.
She took a fourth, thinking of how Rhay had completely written her off.
She took a fifth, thinking about how saddened her mother would be if she could see her now.
