The fogginess slowly seeped from her eyes as she blinked.Finally, recognition cleared her features.Peter’s stomach plunged as her lips drooped in disappointment as she realized that it was her husband and not her mother who had been caring for her.
“Ay, qué dolor,” Ana said, pressing a hand to her lower abdomen as pain flashed across her features.“What happened?”
“Do you not remember?”
“I remember Esperanza was sleeping.And then I go for a walkafuera...”
“Yes, quite a walk you had, dear.I found you collapsed near the chapel.”
“Tan lejos?” Surprise was just as apparent in her widened eyes as it was in her heightened voice.
“Indeed, that far.I found you, and you were bleeding and barely conscious.Mr.Smith assisted me in calling for Dr.Lee, and after he determined that you could be moved, we returned.Blessedly, there is nothing to be greatly concerned about.Your bleeding increased due to your long exertion.”
“But if I bleed, that is bad, no?”
“Dr.Lee determined that it is somewhat normal to experience some bleeding in your condition, although such a long walk is not advised for now.It certainly aggravated your bleeding.”
Ana dipped her chin, pressing her eyes shut.“And Esperanza?”
“She has been sleeping soundly, although I suspect she will be quite hungry soon.”
The wrinkle of tension that laced Ana’s forehead smoothed at his words.“I think I wanted to find the chapel to talk withmi Dios.I only remember this.But all is well, no?”
“I’m afraid all is not well.”
Peter recognized the stubborn set of her jaw all too well and forged ahead before she could stop him.“Dr.Lee inquired after the state of your feelings.He said it is typical for new mothers to experience a wide, confusing range of feelings, particularly in the weeks that follow the birth of a child.While this symptom is normal to an extent, some cases become prolonged or complicated.”
Ana’s hands clenched the sheets.“Estoy bien.I feelbien.I have none of theseproblemas.How can Dr.Lee say these things when he notknow me well?”Her voice cracked, tears flooding her eyes.
“Dr.Lee only wished to ensure that you are able to fully heal from Essie’s birth, both in body and in mind.”
“In mind, I am fine,” she protested, waving a hand at him.“But yes, I see I need to rest for this bleeding,no?”
This was going terribly.Peter heaved a sigh.He ought to have requested that Dr.Leestay to explain the symptoms himself.
“To aid in your recovery, he prescribed a longer-than-typical lying-in period.You are to stay about the house for a month more.I will write Mother to delay our trip to Heathridge Hall.And seeing as you were so desperate to enjoy the fresh air, I do believe we can make some exceptions as far as taking short walks in the gardens, and even attending Sunday services so long as we take a carriage...”
“But why I need a longer lying-in when I say thatestoy bien!Does Dr.Lee not listen to me?Do you not listen to me?”
Peter barely resisted the urge to drop his head into his hands.Dr.Lee had warned that she may grow defensive, indicating that Ana was experiencing great emotional difficulty.Desperation gnawed at him.But how could he help her?
“Perhaps you would like my mother to come back to help for a time?The diversion of her company could help your recovery feel more enjoyable.And she would help with Essie if permitted.Perhaps then when I...when the army is recalled, you will be more comfortable with her help.”
Ana’s eyes darted to the bassinet at her bedside, where a rosy-cheeked Esperanza lay slumbering peacefully.“Yes,está bien.Yourmamácan come.”
“Very well, I will write her.But only if you are certain.”
Ana shifted closer to Esperanza.“I am.”
“Very well.”Peter leaned down to kiss her cheek, but she leaned away.He tried to smile and ignore the pain that stabbed through him.He was losing the very fragile connection he had with his wife, without knowing why it was happening at all.
* * *
Mother arrived quite speedily upon receiving his letter.The next morning, she was on their doorstep, bearing Peter’s favorite raspberry tarts, fresh linens and gowns for Ana, and adorably knitted blankets for Esperanza.She interrogated him now, eager to help Ana.
“I cannot understand it, Mother,” Peter shook his head.“Ana is so entirely changed.She is unceasingly anxious for Essie’s welfare and does not trust another to assist her.And while she tries to deny her changed state, she also acknowledges that she is not herself.She has begun to question whether God is punishing her for having a child that is not her husband’s by sending these moods and dreams that torment her so.”
“Do you suspect she could be suffering from melancholy?”Mother asked.
