‘Everything in the way it has. Us was a good thing. You have to believe me. But the timing . . .’
Effie drained her tea and stood up. ‘In that case, I think you’d better go. Since you’ve got an early start. And a big decision to make. Just make sure you make your own mind up, Jake, that you do what you want, not what anyone else thinks you should do.’
Jake flinched at the hardness in her voice before standing up. As he moved, he reached for her, but Effie stepped back, folding her arms into her body to keep herself held together. He moved across the flat, cutting through the moonlight. He pulled open the door, paused to look back at her. Regret flickered over his face. He opened his mouth, but whatever he was going to say, to make it better or worse, was trapped within him.
Effie flinched as the door clicked shut. Silence flooded in as the tears overflowed.
Chapter Thirty-Seven
After a terrible night’s sleep, Effie knew the only thing that would set her right was a swim. After hauling herself out of bed, she pulled on her wetsuit, tugged her hair into a braid and stomped out of the flat. A flat grey sky hung over the harbour, so at least that matched her mood. Crossing the road, she froze as her name was called.
‘Effie.’ Jake’s voice was strangled with emotion.
She paused, pulled by the longing in his voice, which reached into her heart and squeezed tight. Effie inhaled a breath before exhaling powerfully, as if to breathe him out of her. Risking a glance over her shoulder, she saw him standing on the pavement by a flashy white car, a smart suitcase at his feet, his camera bag across his body. He looked as wretched as she felt.Good, Effie thought, pulling herself up to her full height, holding her head high, pleased that he was suffering with his choice. Although she was sure once he was on the plane heading to a tropical island, he’d forget all about Polcarrow, and about her.
Tears pricked at her eyes as she watched the scene unfold. Tara dashed out of the café. Even her casual wear was stylish.
‘Jakey, I got you a flat white and a bacon bap. I’ve got to come back here, babes, I want to show everyone that café, and that bookshop looks adorable. Jakey, are you listening?’ Tara’s exasperation was laced with intimacy, a tone she’d clearly used on Jake numerous times during their relationship. ‘What are you—Oh.’
Tara’s eyes met with Effie’s, held like a challenge. Effie was determined not to be the first to look away.
Jake finished loading his bags into the boot and took his coffee. ‘Cheers. I’m all done.’
‘Good, come on, we’ve not got all day, got a flight to catch. Got your passport?’
Jake patted his top pocket and rolled his eyes. Effie couldn’t help but watch as he fell back into easy familiarity with Tara. Jake took one last look at Effie and called, ‘I’ll be back in two weeks.’
Two weeks?Effie winced, that was a long time, longer than he’d implied. She didn’t have time to respond because as soon as he was in the car, Tara pulled away from the kerb and sped along the harbour front as if she was trying to win first prize in the Grand Prix.
Effie watched them go before setting her shoulders and heading onto the beach. She shrugged off her dry robe and waded into the sea, enjoying the way the cold water tugged her back into the present, focused her back on herself. She submerged, allowing herself to become one with the sea, but as she swam, her brain crowded with all the things she should have told Jake. Not just how much she liked him but that, in fact, she was falling in love with him, no matter how hard she’d tried not to. She held that thought; it was life altering and all consuming. Maybe it would have made him stay if she’d told him? Or maybe it was better to keep it to herself, just in case he rekindled his romance with Tara. After all, they had a whole history built together over years, all Effie had were some rickety, thrown-together foundations.
Falling in love had always been the dream but never the plan. Love existed like something ethereal, just out of reach, an abstract thing she read about in books and lay in bed dreaming about. Effie had yearned for it but hadn’t really expected to find it. Now she had she didn’t quite know what to do. Not that she could do anything with Jake jetting off to the Maldives with his ex. If she even was still his ex.
Effie briefly wondered if she should’ve just asked him to stay but the rational part of her understood that he had obligations, commitments. She also knew she couldn’t make his mind up for him and it was best to retain her own dignity. If he got back together with Tara then clearly he wasn’t the man for her. Or even the man she thought he was. Maybe she just had to trust him, trust that he was telling the truth, that this really was one last hurrah for Tara and Jake, something to please the fans.
Still, that didn’t sit right with Effie. She’d become wrapped up in Jake, swept off her feet by his kindness, his bright blue eyes. After a fortnight of jet-setting, would sleepy Polcarrow really be enough to tempt him back? What could she offer him really, other than a rented bookshop with a sea view and a love of swimming. Would Jake choose luxury over simplicity? Effie pondered this and realised, with dismay, that she didn’t really know him well enough to guess.
Tired of her own negative thoughts and before they could drag herself any further under, Effie swam back towards the shore. Rubbing her hair with a towel, she glanced up to Jake’s flat window, a traitorous smile tugging at her lips as she remembered him thinking she was a seal. After throwing on her dry robe, Effie made her way up the beach, pleased that the swim had been invigorating and restorative.
‘What’s going on?’ Lola asked the second Effie walked through the door. Her face was etched with concern. ‘Who was that woman?’
‘Tara. Jake’s ex.’
Lola’s mouth fell open and she was struck speechless, which was something Effie guessed didn’t happen often.
‘His ex?’
Effie nodded.
‘Where on earth did she come from?’
‘Bristol, I think. They only split up earlier this year. Or they were on a break. I no longer know which,’ Effie explained. She didn’t think it was her place to tell Lola about the broken engagement. Jan, Jake’s mum, could fill her in on the details if she felt inclined. ‘They’ve gone to do some work in the Maldives. They are, were, influencers.’
‘Influencers? Well, I never!’ Lola gave a disapproving ‘hmm’ as she reached for a mug. ‘The usual?’
‘Please.’ Effie sat down. ‘And can I have one of those flapjacks too, please.’
‘Of course, and extra marshmallows after all that. So, are they back together?’ Lola asked as she placed Effie’s breakfast in front of her. ‘I thought you two were getting really close. I had my money on you getting together. You make such a sweet couple.’
