“Oh my God,” I drag. “I messed up guys. This is about my shortcomings. Not Za’s, I fell in love with her friend and ruined their friendship. It’s time you stop ignoring my flaws and highlighting hers. She has every right to be mad at me. I’m wrong.”
“Jabari—” Za says.
“Nah Zee,” I say. “It’s time they accept that I am not perfect. I’m very flawed. We all are. Chinaza is the best of us, okay? Stop going so hard on her.”
The room is silent.
“You’re with Francine?”
“OH MY GOSH MUM!” Za and I shout.
“Just congratulate your daughter,” I ask. “She deserves it.”
“Jabari, I don't need?—”
“Congratulations, Chinaza.” Mum’s voice is small. “I— Iamproud of you.”
“Can we talk?”I ask quietly as we walk towards the door together.
Za hesitates, then nods.
We step outside. The evening air is cool, the faint hum of traffic filling the silence between us. It’s awkward at first, and I’m tempted to bring up Frankie and our situation which I’m sure played a part in her decision.
However, she’s tense enough as it is. So, I pivot.
“You’re really leaving, huh?” I ask.
“Yes.”
“You sound like you’ve wanted this for a long time.”
“I have.”
“You deserve it.”
She looks away at that.
“It’s good you’re doing something for yourself,” I add. “Something that isn’t about Mum. Or me. Or… anything else.”
Her jaw tightens slightly at that last part because we both know who I’m referring to. It’s odd though. I came back to England to get to know my sister but I hardly made time for her. I barely know more now than I did when I arrived. I didn’t even know this was a goal of hers, I don’t know the role she got.
I don’t know anything.
And I’m sure she wants to keep it that way. A part of me thinks she wants this part of her life for herself. Still, I couldn’t help myself.
“What show are you in?” I ask. “Maybe I could catch a few before you go on tour.”
She doesn’t look at me, “I… I think I need time, Jabari.”
My stomach drops and my eyes gloss. “Okay… I get it. Maybe during the tour.”
“Yeah,” she looks at the traffic. “Maybe.”
More silence.
“You should come to the game then,” I say. “The one at the end of the month.”
She glances at me. “Will Francine be there?”
