If only she knew.
If only she knew that I’ve spent a month burning alive in that booth, trying like hell to keep myself together long enough to walk out the door. If only she knew that I’ve barely slept a wink since I met her, and when I finally drift off, I see her face in my dreams. If only she knew that she’s wrecked me completely, that I’d tear my life apart if she asked.
If only she fucking knew.
6
JOSIE
I stay quiet during dinner,embarrassed over how I acted with Brewer. I wish I’d played it cool instead of bringing up how he ignores me.
Seriously, why did I say that?
I’m just the girl who serves him breakfast; he doesn’t owe me his attention…but he’s sure as heck giving it to me right now. I can feel his eyes burning holes in my face as we tuck into our lasagna. He’s sitting directly opposite me, and our legs keep brushing under the table, the space too small to contain him. The contact makes my heart lurch every time, and it happens so much that I’m starting to think he’s doing it on purpose.
Savannah does most of the talking as we eat, coaxing the men into conversation, but I’m struggling to manage one-word answers. Then Brewer’s leg brushes mine again, and I make the mistake of looking up at him. He’s staring at me, his food forgotten on the plate in front of him, those dark eyes stormy and intense. I hold his gaze for a beat too long before Savannah pulls me back to reality.
“So, Josie,” she says, giving me a pointed look, “met any cute guys at the diner recently?”
I almost roll my eyes. She’s not exactly subtle, and neither is Brewer’s reaction. I see him tense, his brow crumpling into a scowl at Savannah’s words, knuckles turning white around his fork.
Is he jealous?
“Easy, sugar,” Clay grunts, leaning over to press a kiss on Savannah’s forehead. “Don’t want you thinking about cute guys.”
“You know I’m not asking for me.” She melts against him with a chuckle. “I’m asking for Josie.” Her eyes meet mine again as she adds, “So, is there anyone?”
Everyone is watching me, waiting for an answer.
“I…well, there’s this one guy.”
The words are out before I can stop them, and I feel the blood rush to my face as I stare fixedly at my lasagna, suddenly very aware of the man sitting directly across from me.
Crap.
Why can’t I stop saying the wrong thing tonight?
I blame Brewer. Something about being this close to him is loosening my tongue, making me reveal way too much.
“Oooh!” Savannah makes a show of looking curious, like she doesn’t know exactly who I’m talking about. “Tell me about him.”
I chew slowly to buy time, and the silence stretches for a beat too long, the howl of wind from outside filling the air.
“There’s nothing to tell.”
“Why not?” Savannah presses.
“Because he doesn’t know I exist.”
A pause.
“What makes you think that?” Brewer grunts.
I wasn’t expecting him to speak, and I’m immediately flustered, caught off-guard. This conversation is spiraling out ofmy control, and it’s impossible to regain composure with those eyes drilling into me.
“He never even looks at me,” I stammer, wishing everyone would turn their attention back to their food. “I guess I’m not exactly the kind of woman that men like him go for.”
“That’s ridiculous.”
