“Extra sugar. I guarantee it,” Trent laughs, pulling out his phone. “Let’s find out what the internet thinks.”
I watch him search for the answer as I dip my burger and bite that greasy goodness. I have no doubt he’s right, though. Americans really love their sweet things, and the result is that most places add sugar to hit that sweet tooth even in savory dishes.
Although, hmmm. “I bet Americans like everything with added sugar because companies add sugar. It’s sweetness saturation that starts from the time we’re babies. We’re so used to everything being sweet that when it’s not we think it doesn’t taste right and our brains tell us we don’t like it.”
“A chef on reddit confirms it’s added sugar,” Trent says, looking up from his phone. “Yeah, kids whose parents feed them whole foods seem like they have less sugar cravings. You’re probably right, and I bet there’s a study out there that lends credibility to your hypothesis.”
The grin that spreads across my face has nothing to do with the topic and everything to do with the fact that Trent knows me so well. He knows I want data, that I want repeatable results and peer reviewed confirmation. It’s nice to be seen so thoroughly.
Hey Cherelynne2pt0, Trent and I definitely love each other, but it’s platonic love, and we’re both happy with our friendship. Thank you for subscribing, and I hope we keep you entertained, engaged, and horny for a long time. XXX -Magnus
***
After spending the rest of the evening in research and writing mode, I finally flop into my bed at midnight, grabbing my phone off the charger to make sure the alarms are set correctly. The red flag count on the app I’m using for our uploads makes me choke and sit up immediately. We have five hundred subscribers. I think about two thirds of those will unsubscribe just before the next month will be charged because they’re broke college students, but there are five hundred comments waiting for us, and I don’t think anyone can blame me for opening up the app even though I should be getting to sleep.
The video I uploaded earlier has gone nuts. We’ve added over a thousand subscribers in the last six hours, and the comments…
Wait, you’re bi?
Are you really bi?
You like that dick?!
Do you like Trent’s dick?
Wanna see you suck him off.
Fuck sucking off, let him plow you!
I knew you guys weren’t “just friends”!!!
And on and on. Some of the comments are descriptive and probably go against physics, but I’ve never had sex with a man,so maybe gay sex involves quantum physics and things that seem impossible are perfectly normal.
We’ve had quite the upsurge in male subs, at least if the comment section is any indication. Not our target audience, but money in the bank nonetheless.
I hop off my bed and am back at my computer in moments, downloading all the data and metrics and printing it off. I’ll have to figure out how to approach Trent with this, because the demographic we were expecting is suddenly in the minority.
And why do they think I’m bisexual? I’m pretty sure I told them I was straight. That’s the whole schtick we’re doing: straight guys fall in love.
I wonder what set them off?
I replay the video, watching carefully for any indication that—ah fuck. I said boyfriend or girlfriend.
I smack my forehead and glance at my bedroom door. I know Trent isn’t homophobic, and he won’t care if everyone thinks I’m bisexual. Will he care if I post a response video without including him? It’s not a marketing decision.
He’s probably asleep anyway. It’ll be fine.
I set up the record function on my phone and smile as I hit the red button. “So, my last video blew up and everyone wants to know all about my sexuality. So, I’m just going to say, I’m attracted to humans. I’ve never thought about labels. Trent has a very beautiful dick, as we all know, and we are going to do a naughty photo session dedicated to it. And I said boyfriend or girlfriend because I strive for inclusivity as much as possible, so let me add non-binary friend and gender queer friend to the list. Ok. Thank you all for participating; your comments are fantastic data points for my research. I hope you all can get off tonight, and” —I pause because maybe I can help them along with that— “maybe this will help.”
I angle the phone to capture my pants, pulling my dick out and stroking it for them. “It’s not as nice as Trent’s, but we can pretend he’s here.”
I chuckle at that, picturing everyone thinking of Trent’s cock. Without really knowing how, mine fills up fast, going to full hardness with ease. I like the easy orgasms, and my mind takes the path of least resistance, which of course means I’m picturing Trent’s cock and his ridiculous O-face in a matter of moments.
“He’s handsome right? Nice cock, the perfect measurements, I think. Not too thick, not too long. Nice coloring too.”
Performing like this is interesting, but it’s working for me.
“My balls are already tingling. You know that tightness and pressure, the sensation at the base of your spine? I’m feeling it all right now.”
