He turns to look at me over his shoulder with a teary smile, but he doesn’t say anything before walking back out of my house.
Sin’s Twenty First Birthday
Sin
Gael loves to celebrate anything he can. For his 16th birthday, I got him anEveryday’s a Celebrationcalendar, and we did something for every day of that year. Since we’re the president and vice president of our fraternity this year, Gael’s gone all out for my birthday. I woke up to the frat house singing happy birthday to me over pancakes, and then the guys took me ice skating. This afternoon was “brothers’ naptime” where we puppy-piled in the den of the frat house for quiet time. The only person not allowed to fall asleep was Rooster because the dude snores louder than anyone.
But tonight, Gael arranged a house party, and the house is filling up with students. The entrance fee is a small gift, and the table of birthday presents is piled high. It’s ridiculous, and I’m hoping most of it is reasonably consumable. Pens, notebooks,hot sauce… things that I can use up before it’s time to move out of the frat house.
As I wander through the throng of bodies receiving a plethora of happy birthdays, I spot Gael on the phone slipping out the back door into the theoretically quieter back yard. Concerned, I weave through the crowd and follow him out. It takes me a few minutes to find him sitting on the bench on the side of the house where years of frat boys pissing on the fence have killed off the grass.
Gael and I organized a pee bale when we took over so that there’s an outdoor place for drunk brothers to piss, and we donate it to the agriculture department when it’s ready. The other frat houses on the lane followed our example, but had to make arrangements with other agriculturists to donate their pee bales. We’ve started a movement to improve soil health in the area because our lawns were dying.
“You alright?” I ask as I sit next to him.
He sighs, but gives me a half smile. “Floppy went to live on the farm, so to speak,” he explains, holding up his phone to illustrate where he learned the news.
We both loved that dog, but he was old, and neither of us have seen him much since Gael and I started school. “I’m sorry to hear that.”
Gael huffs, shoving his phone into the pocket of his jacket. “Me too. Let’s go party. The Chug Brothers are on sober duty tonight. We have permission to get blasted.” He smiles, bright as the day he adopted Floppy, and I follow him to his feet.
I pull out a little package of gummies and dangle them in front of him. “This won’t leave us hung over in the morning.”
Gael’s sunshine is nearly blinding as he laughs, swiping the gummies from me. “Let’s ask Gena if she wants to party before we open these. She told me she gets super horny when she’s high.”
Gena’s the girl we fuck when he’s between girls. She says she’s never going to be someone’s partner, but she enjoys hooking up with us when Gael’s single. I can’t think of any better gift than playing with my best friend on my birthday.
Present Day
Phineas
He’s ignoring me.
I don’t know how he’s able to. He is constantly on my mind—they both are, invading my thoughts, distracting me with their absence. How are they able to let my calls go unanswered and leave my texts onread? They’re my fated mates, and they’ve ghosted me. How? How are they able to do this? What happened?
I miss them so much, it hurts. My entire body aches with the pain of loss. This isn’t supposed to happen. They’re not supposed to beableto break up with me. We’re fated mates. Why haven’t either of them come for me? Why haven’t they called or texted or anything at all.
My stomach revolts against the loss of my mates, and I lose what little is left in my stomach. I took the day off. I said I have the flu. It’s not true. It’s because my mates are rejecting me. I need them. I need to tell them that I need them. Somehow. I don’t know how I’ll be able to communicate that to them, but I have to figure out a way. I don’t think I can survive without them.
Chapter 8
Present Day
Sin
I got a text message from Gael a few days after he left. The funeral was on the sixth day. It’s been a week since then. He hasn’t called me, and he won’t answer my calls either. Every text I’ve sent him, he’s left on read without answering. I don’t have Phin’s number, so I haven’t heard from him either. I tried Gael’s parents’ house, but the number I remembered was no good, and I recalled too late that he’d said they’d gotten rid of their landline a couple years ago.
I’ve spent the last two weeks alone and worried with too much time to think. Or maybe not enough. I don’t know.
It’s close to the end of the last semester of my graduate degree. In a month I’ll have my Master’s in linguistics, so I’ve been busy with my thesis work—it’s the only reason I’ve been able to stay sane without the entire left side of my body. It feels like half of myself has been amputated without Gael here, and without the translation work that I do for my internet clients,my thesis work, and the studying I’ve immersed myself in, I’d be drowning in worry. If I could, I’d drive my ass back home just to lay eyes on Gael.
I haven’t been away from him for this long in years, and I don’t understand why he’s ignoring me. How am I supposed to take care of Phin when I don’t even know how to get in touch with him? Gael should have at least shared his contact card with me, but he left that request on read just like all my other texts.
A knock at my door disrupts my lonely thoughts. I know it’s not Gael because he has a key to my place and would just walk in, but I rush to the door anyway. When I open it, Phin’s haggard expression greets me. Unexpectedly, happiness and relief flood through me; I thought I would be more angry when I finally saw him again, but I’m just glad he’s finally shown his face.
I pull him by the front of his shirt into my house and slam the door before hugging him around his barrel chest. I’ve missed him, and I wish that wasn’t true.
“What took you so long?” I demand—there’s the expected flush of anger. I push him away with all my strength, and he hits the door hard. “Where have you been? I don’t have your phone number, and Gael won’t answer my calls. Why did you wait so long to come over?”
