I stood there feeling bereft, like I’d lost her all over again. I knew that was ridiculous. I didn’t have her now, and I knew I never would again. But I was still feeling the loss of her all these years later.
I wished I had a time machine. I’d go back and change every stupid decision I’d made my freshman, sophomore, and junior years of college.
But that wasn’t possible. I couldn’t undo the hurt I’d caused; I could only try to heal it.
Chapter Twenty-Five
Sadie
I was nervous as I walked into the banquet hall. Indigo Falls didn’t have a lot of places to hold events, and most of us had been to this banquet hall for a variety of reasons over the years. Birthday parties, retirements, bridal showers, family reunions—all of them tended to be held in this building. It hadn’t been updated in a couple of decades at least, and even though it could really use it, there was a strange level of comfort in the fact that it stayed the same. The only thing that ever changed was the decorations.
It was the end of school and things were insane, as they always were. I was trying to help out with Melinda’s classes as much as I could to take some of the pressure off her. If I ever got married, I wanted to do it low-key, on a beach somewhere with only a few friends and family present. We could have a big party after we returned home. I definitely didn’t want to go through the level of planning I was seeing Melinda and her mother have to do.
Because things were so crazy as school was wrapping up for the year, I hadn’t even really paid much attention to the invitation when I’d received it. I wasn’t entirely sure who was even hosting this particular party. I just bought a gift and showed up. I flipped my hair over my shoulder and smoothed out my dress. I hoped it wasn’t too short. When I’d bought it, I’dfigured it would work for one of her parties. As I saw the people going into the hall, I wasn’t so sure. It was all the little old ladies from Melinda’s church. I winced inwardly. It was too late to go home and change now.
I walked in, set my present on the gift table, and looked around. The place was packed out. Melinda and Drake looked uncomfortable sitting at a small table in the center of the room. The rest of the tables were long and arranged in a U shape, so everyone was pretty much staring at them. I had to smother a laugh at the awkward smile pasted on Drake’s face.
I walked over and leaned down. “Hey,” I whispered to Melinda. “Who’s hosting this party?”
“My mom’s Sunday school class and her garden club.”
“Wow.” I exchanged a look with Drake. “So, this will be themostfun party of them all, huh?”
She snorted and then pretended to cough when she realized how many people were staring at her.
“I’m re-thinking the length of my dress,” I admitted.
“Oh, I’m sure it’s fine…” she stopped talking when she saw the hemline. “Well, it is a little short.”
“That’s what I was afraid of. I guess I’ll be the talk of the town for a week or so.”
“Doubt it,” Drake said with a smirk as the door opened.
I turned to look and was startled to see Harrison coming into the banquet hall.
I turned around slowly to Melinda, eyes wide. “Why is he here? I wouldn’t think any of those ladies would want him around.”
“Wedding party,” she said weakly. “He’ll be invited to everything.”
Good to know. I put on a smile, concentrating to make it look real. “Have fun being the center of attention,” I said as I patted Drake on his shoulder and then went to find my seat.
There were name cards in front of each place setting. There weren’t many vacant seats, and all of the wedding party was sitting together. So, it wasn’t rocket science to figure out where I was supposed to be.
The only empty spot was next to Harrison. Of course it was.
I sighed inwardly and made my way over.
I sat down just in time for the preacher to stand up and ask us all to stand, join hands, and pray. Melinda’s preacher was a legend for the length of his prayers, so I knew we were in for a long one.
And I had to hold Harrison’s hand.
I looked down at his hand as if it was a snake but then took it anyway. I was shocked at the zap of energy that seemed to flow through me as I touched him. I looked up and met his dark brown eyes, wondering if he felt it, too. We stared at each other for a moment, before I bowed my head and closed my eyes. As the preacher settled in for a sermon-length prayer, I realized that it felt natural holding Harrison’s hand. Like coming home.
That realization made me want to drop his hand, but I didn’t want to be obviously rude. I’d seen people’s eyes on us and knew that my dress wouldn’t be the topic of conversation around town this week. It would be either about Harrison being in town for the party, the two of us sitting beside each other, or both.
Either way, I knew we were being scrutinized. I didn’t want to give anyone the opportunity to feel sorry for me. I didn’t want any more pity because of my horrible breakup with Harrison. So, I pretended to be fine.
Even though I wasn’t.
