Confusion hits first. Then irritation.
“Do what? Go for a swim?”
His jaw tightens, his face pale beneath the anger. “Don’t play dumb. You weren’t just going for a swim.”
“I’m not playing dumb!” My voice cracks, still rough from dragging in air. “And I was going for a swim. The fact that I was literally in your pool should’ve been a pretty solid clue.”
He shakes me once, not hard, but firm enough to rattle my teeth. “You were staying under. You weren’t coming up.”
“What?” I stare at him, water dripping down my face. “I was—” I cough again, swiping at my eyes. “I was just diving.”
“Just diving?” His voice spikes. “You were down there way too long.”
“I like being underwater!” I shoot back. “It’s quiet. It’s peaceful. You should try it sometime instead of catastrophizing everything.”
“Okay. This ends now,” he says, decisive. “We’re going to the hospital. Right now. And after that, you’re talking to a therapist. I don’t care if you ‘feel like it.’ I’ll pay for it privately. Your dad doesn’t have to know.”
I blink at him.
“What are you even talking about?” I demand.
“You mustn’t kill yourself,” he says, voice low and brutal, like he’s forcing the words out through clenched teeth. “You hear me? You mustn’t.”
For a second I just stare at him, brain blank.
Then the words land.
Kill yourself.
My stomach drops so hard it feels like I’m sinking all over again.
“What?” I whisper.
Jake’s eyes are wild, and I’ve never seen him look like this. Not even when he was furious about the papers. This is different. This is fear dressed up as anger.
He swallows, throat working. “Only because I’m angry with you doesn’t mean there’s no way to be happy anymore,” he snaps. “You don’t get to decide it’s over and do something stupid because you feel cornered. Not—”
Something inside me detonates.
I shove him hard, both hands on his chest, and he stumbles back a step.
“You stupid oaf!” I scream, voice echoing off the tile and glass. “Are you actually out of your mind?”
His eyes flash. “Don’t—”
“No, you don’t get to barge in here like some hero from a bad action movie and decide I’m suicidal because I held my breath.”
“You weren’t just holding your breath.”
“Yes. I was.”
“You were limp.”
“I was floating!”
“You weren’t moving.”
“That’s how floating works, Jake!”
