The echoes of the evening screeched loudly.
Then a noise from inside the house.
I walked past my car, spotting the flowers that I took from Andre’s gravesite, replacing them with newer ones. I went to grieve in silence, to enjoy his birthday together. To let him know I hadn’t forgotten about him, never would. Stayed there from the moment they opened the gates until all my tears dried up.
As I was leaving, Courtland showed up, squatting near the headstone with flowers and a gift. Grief heavy on his face. Looking just like his father. Always had since birth. Although time has passed him, the shadows of his father’s loss never faded. Watching him, the baby, the child that he was, the one who had to witness the event that changed the course of his life, grieve in agony, I couldn’t even console him.
I knew he’d never leave his father’s side. Not then, not ever. They were thick as thieves since birth. My son lost his light after that. Became cold. Distant. Meaner. He lost the one person that mattered the most to him and continued with life through all its adversities.
My stomach twisted watching him cry. I stayed in the distance, heartbreaking before driving away. It hurt to leave, but I had to.
The further I rolled along, the more that ache stabbed me deeper.
The sound of tires screeching in the distance brought me out of my thoughts again. I rushed into the house to see Maleek standing over shattered glass.
“Maleek, what the hell is wrong with you?”
“Why you gotta be like that, Ma? Court’s my brother, your son, and you won’t even let me see him. That shit ain’t fair.”
“Enough, Maleek. Watch your damn mouth in my house.”
I dropped to the floor to clean the shards to avoid someone getting hurt. My hands shook as I forced my thoughts to the back of my mind.
“No, Ma. You’re wrong. Always wrong.” He paused. “What kind of mother keep her kids away from each other? I don’t even know why I can’t see him because you keep everything a secret.”
My head snapped in his direction.
“I don’t owe you a fucking explanation. I’m the parent. Remember that.”
“So, that makes it right? You haven’t seen Courtland in years. Don’t even know him, but you call him a bad influence and keep me away from him.”
I didn’t even recognize my boy right now. His temper blazed like Courtland’s, reminding me that I couldn’t shelter him from the storm brewing.
“I refuse for you to go down the wrong path.”
“Court’s fucking rich, Ma. He’s out here doing it big… The only bad influence here is you.”
My heart shattered.
“Me?”
“Yes, you because daily you run this house like a machine. Sometimes I question if you’re even human. I hear you cry at night, then in the day you walk away angry like… like a…”
“Like a what, Maleek?”
I felt it coming but couldn’t brace myself.
“Like a bitch, Ma. I hate to be disrespectful but that’s what you act like… All because of Daddy being gone. You take it out on everybody.”
I swiftly stood.
SMACK!
“You watch your goddamn mouth. That’s exactly why you’re not seeing him anymore. Look at who you’ve become after being with him.”
Maleek was shaken.
Then it settled into anger as his pupils turned cold. His nostrils flared. His chest puffed out. He looked dangerous, damaged and hurt.
