We’re in this mansion. Like, a literal fucking mansion from the olden times. Wrought iron gates guard the house from the public. The front hall is lined with busts of famous dead people. The floors are marble and the ceilings are double height. Every room is lit by massive crystal chandeliers. The walls are covered with priceless art. The furniture is antique. The ceilings are trimmed with gold. This is supposed to be someone’s house, but it looks more like they tried to cram every single expensive thing they could find into the building. Honestly? It’s pretty ugly.
We’re shooting the venue-scouting scene for the documentary, so I’m supposed to wander around the place with Bellamy with my jaw on the floor, which isn’t difficult because every room we walk into is worse than the last.
I’ve been given a GoPro to hold while we work our way through the house. Sebastian has another one, while Hayden’s got the big fancy camera. He circles around us, head bowed and eyes focused on the viewscreen, stopping every once in a while to check camera angles with Sebastian.
I was told to ignore Hayden and pretend the camera isn’t there. But my gaze keeps drifting in his direction, like a compass always pointing toward true north. I can’t help it. This isn’t sitting right with me.
Hayden seems okay on the surface. He’s taking instructions from Sebastian and getting the work done. He’s a little quiet, but I’m realizing that’s just the way he is around the guys. He’s the quiet one in the group. The one who lets his friends take the spotlight. But I’m getting really bad vibes, like there’s a giant elephant in the room that no one else can see except me.
I’ve had the apartment almost entirely to myself the past couple days. Hayden’s kept to himself, only coming out of his room to go to the bathroom or get something to drink from the kitchen. But he always immediately goes back and closes the door behind him.
I’ve tried to catch him on those rare occasions, tried to ask how he was doing, whether he wanted to grab something to eat together. He kept saying he wasn’t hungry and he was tired, then he would disappear again. Unless he’s got some stash hidden in his room, I’m pretty sure he hasn’t eaten in almost forty-eight hours. He definitely hadn’t showered. Hell, I didn’t know if he would even show up to the shoot today.
But this morning, he emerged from his room, showered and dressed, a tuft of blond hair sticking out of the hole at the back of the backward baseball cap on his head. There were bags under his eyes and he looked a little gaunt, but other than that, there was no sign he’d been a fucking hermit all weekend.
He made coffee, had some toast for breakfast, and asked me how I was feeling about the first day of shooting. Like everything was totally normal. Like nothing had happened in the park that day.
But something did. I was right there. The dude was not okay. He was hyperventilating and shaking uncontrollably. I thought he was going to pass out or something. I’m not even sure how he managed to walk all the way home.
And he didn’t want me to call his friends for help. Which kind of makes me think that they have absolutely no fucking clue that there’s anything wrong with him. Either that, or having panic attacks in the middle of public parks is a normal occurrence for Hayden. I don’t know, man… that doesn’t feel normal to me.
“This is perfect,” Noel announces as he turns in a circle in the middle of the ballroom. Giant gilded mirrors line the walls and three enormous chandeliers hang from the ceiling.
Standing next to him, Bellamy looks skeptical. “Seriously?”
“For the ceremony, yeah.”
“Don’t you think it’s a bit…” Bellamy trails off.
“Ugly? Tacky? Gimmicky?” I offer a bunch of options and Noel shoots a murderous look in my direction.
“It’s just not really my style, babe.” Bellamy’s way more diplomatic than I am.
“Why don’t you guys have a beach wedding?” I ask. “You know, breeze coming off the water, ocean scent in the air, sun shining down on the warm sand.”
“That does sound nice,” Sebastian agrees.
“What happens if it rains?” Noel crosses his arms over his chest, glowering. “I don’t want to resort to plan B. We’re only having a plan A and plan A is going to be perfect.”
This is all in the script Sebastian wrote for us, but Noel is actually really convincing. So either he’s a much better actorthan I thought he was, or he’s genuinely this stuck-up in real life. I’d bet on the latter.
Bellamy sighs. He’s wearing that amused and indulgent expression he has for Noel. Like he knows how ridiculous Noel is being, but he finds it endearing rather than annoying. He pulls Noel into his arms and waits until Hayden’s in place to catch a close-up shot of them both. “You really like this place, don’t you?”
Noel pouts a little, giving Bellamy puppy dog eyes as he nods. It looks hilarious on a guy who’s always scowling, but it works because Bellamy fucking melts.
“Okay, fine, we’ll do the wedding here.” Bellamy sounds exasperated, but he looks completely smitten. Noel does too.
When they lean in for a kiss, it’s full-on with tongue and everything. If I didn’t know better, I would’ve thought they were going to strip down and fuck right then and there.
They’re still going at it when Sebastian calls, "Cut!" They don’t stop immediately either. They take their time, slowing to soft, lingering kisses that leave them panting.
“Hayden. Santino. You guys are up,” Sebastian calls, gesturing for us to follow him down a long hallway. “Here’s how it’s going to work. Santino, you’ll be looking at the art. Hayden, you’ll be filming him. I’ll be filming both of you.”
“Do you want me to actually record?” Hayden asks, holding up his camera.
“Yeah, definitely. I might be able to edit some of your footage in with mine.” Sebastian says. “Then Santino turns. You make eye contact. Hayden keeps recording as you guys flirt. Got it?”
Suddenly, my heart is racing. It wasn’t beating this fast when we showed up this morning for the first day of shooting. It wasn’t even beating this fast when Sebastian first called out action. This is it—just me and Hayden on screen and I’m going to have to sell it. If I fuck this up…
