Today is my day off. No work until tomorrow night, when I'll squeeze into the black-and-white uniform and serve champagne to people who spend more on appetizers than I make in amonth. Some fancy gala downtown. The catering company calls me when they need extra hands. Which isn't often enough, but it pays cash same night.
My mother agreed to watch Lily. She'd agreed with that particular tone in her voice. The one that says I'm doing you a favor and you owe me gratitude.
I'll take it. I don't have a choice.
The phone buzzes a third time. I flip it over, expecting another debt reminder or my mother's passive-aggressive follow-up.
Jack: Video call with Lily at 5pm? Miss my princess.
My jaw tightens. Miss his princess. Right. He misses her so much he moved to New York for a "career opportunity" two months after I left him. Didn't fight for custody. Didn't even ask for visitation rights. Just... vanished into his new life with her.
The mistress. Twenty-three years old, blonde, works at some marketing firm. I found out about her six months before I finally left. The discovery wasn't even dramatic. No lipstick on collars or mysterious charges on credit cards. Just his phone lighting up while he showered, and me finally having the courage to look.
Hey baby, can't wait to see you tonight.
I'd stood there in our bedroom and felt nothing.
That's what scared me most. Not anger. Not heartbreak. Just a hollow recognition that I'd been gone from this marriage long before I knew it.
Fine, I type back now. 5pm works.
He'll call from wherever he actually is. Probably her apartment. Probably with her hovering just off-screen, waiting for him to finish this inconvenient obligation to his daughter. He told everyone he took a position with some investment firm in Manhattan. A fresh start. A chance to rebuild.
Jack is a good liar. The best I've ever met. He lies the way other people breathe.
I used to believe every word.
Lily finishes her toast and holds up her plate. "All done!"
"Good girl. Let's get you cleaned up."
I wipe her face with a damp paper towel while she squirms and giggles. Normal morning. Normal routine. The kind of ordinary I fought so hard to build.
As I rinse her plate in the sink, I catch my reflection in the window. Tired eyes. Hair scraped back in a messy bun.
I don't miss Jack.
The realization still surprises me sometimes. Years of marriage, and I feel lighter without him. Like I'd been carrying rocks in my pockets and didn't notice until I finally set them down.
Why did it take so long?
The question circles my mind as I help Lily pick out clothes for the day. Purple shirt with a butterfly. Pink leggings. Mismatched socks because she insists that's her "style."
Why did I stay? Why did I believe him when he said I was overreacting? Why did I apologize for things that weren't my fault? Why did I shrink and shrink and shrink until I barely existed?
I don't have answers. Maybe I never will.
But I'm here now. Broke, exhausted, drowning in debt I still don't fully understand.
Free.
"Mommy?" Lily tugs my sleeve. "Can we go to the park today?"
I check my mental calendar. No work. No appointments. Just us.
"Yeah, baby girl." I smile, and this time it's real. "Let's go to the park."
Nico
