“Okay? Just ‘okay’?”
“Were you expecting me to throw my arms around you?”
“No, that would’ve been too much. Okay is fine. The rest of our stuff arrives next week, so you’ll have all your things back.”
“I don’t know if I want them here.”
“What do you mean?”
“They’re memories.”
“And you want to get rid of them.”
“I don’t know. Maybe it’ll make it easier.”
I sigh, disheartened. “I don’t think it’ll make it easier, but if you want, we can keep everything in the garage until you’ve decided. And we can go out and buy whatever you need here. We can go into town, or to the Letterkenny Shopping Centre – there might be a better choice there. It’s only about twenty miles away. We can go and spend the day there, if you want.”
I’ve given it my best shot.
“That doesn’t change the fact that I hate you.”
“I would never have dreamed of it.”
“And I hate this place.”
“Trust me, that makes two of us.”
“Then why are we here?”
I sigh, and decide to tell her the truth. “Because I didn’t know what else to do.”
Skylar grimaces, but doesn’t hit me with one of her cutting remarks.
“Come on, let’s go downstairs. Dinner will be on the table.”
I get to my feet as she slides down from the windowsill, throwing the earphones onto the bed and shoving her phone into the pocket of her jeans.
I should say something. I should tell her I’m sorry, that I never wanted this to happen, that I wish I could help her get through this – but the truth is that I’m not the right person to do it. It’s like Tyler said earlier: I’m not capable of commitment, let alone of taking care of a teenager. I want to tell her that I’ll sort everything out; that one day it won’t hurt so much, and she’ll be happy again. But I don’t know that for sure, and I don’t want to keep lying to her. So I stay silent, like an idiot, watching her leave the room and go downstairs to join her grandparents.
I don’t know whether everything will work out, just as I don’t know whether I’m the right person to take care of her, but I can’t turn my back on her. I can’t ignore this commitment, pretend that she’s not my responsibility. I can’t abandon her.
Skylar needs me. And I need to find a way to help her, to make her understand that I’m here for her – even if she doesn’t want me around, I’ll always be there for her, even if she doesn’t believe me.
Niall
When I come downstairs, Tyler has just arrived, and is handing a bunch of flowers to my mother.
“Tyler Hayes, you are always such a gentleman.”
“I picked them from my garden.”
“I’ll go and put them in a vase.”
Mum walks away as I grab my half-finished beer from the kitchen counter and open the fridge to get one for him. I open it and hand it to him, as he thanks me with a nod. He takes a few sips right away.
“Hey!” he says to Skylar, who’s leaning against the counter with her arms folded across her chest. Her expression tells us quite clearly that we shouldn’t do anything to piss her off.
“I’m Tyler.” He holds out his hand, and she looks at it, almost disgusted. “I’m an old friend of your dad.” This piece of information doesn’t interest her.
