“I don’t think I’ve ever been in love before, because I’ve never felt the way I feel now, about you. You have to believe me when I tell you that it can’t be anything but love.”
“You can’t—”
“You were beautiful as a kid, Jordan. You were so bright, so intelligent. You were sexy, unobtainable. And you’re even more beautiful now, as a woman. And, okay, you’re bossy, controlling and proud – but I know that you’re also sweet, and good, and kind. With me, you let yourself go, because you know that you can be whoever you want around me. Because I love you. And when you love someone, you just love them, full stop. There are no compromises, or agreements to sign. There’s no small print at the bottom of the page. I’ve learnt that recently.”
I laugh, the tears uncontrollable now.
“I’m sorry that someone else broke your heart so badly that you don’t believe in love anymore; but I’m here now, if you want, to help you learn to believe again.”
“It’s not that easy.”
“No, it’s not. And that’s the problem; trust. I need you to trust me.”
“I don’t know if I can.”
He smiles, sadly. “I thought you might say that. It’s always hard to trust the bad boy at school.”
“Too hard.”
He sighs heavily, then speaks again.
“Just give me a reason to stay. Give me a reason to start over. Give me someone to love. Give meyou. I want to love you, but only if you’ll let me. Only if you want to love me back.”
I really want to; but I’m terrified by the possibility of falling for him. I can’t do anything now but let my heavy breathing fill the silence.
“This is our last call, Jordan. There won’t be any others. You get to decide, now.”
He steps closer to me and drops a kiss onto my cheek, before heading towards the door and leaving me standing, alone, in my apartment, with nothing but my tears and my fear for company.
I have the biggest decision of my life to make.
Niall
The whole city seems to have showed up for the final match of the tournament, my family included. Even my sister has come to witness my discomfort – and I’m not talking about the team. I’m talking about mypersonalproblems. I know I just said that the entire city was sitting on those bleachers, but there’s one person missing: the most important person of all. I guess my little speech didn’t mean anything to her. I could’ve done it better, but I’m still learning. I mean, I’m still me, after all – I can’t work miracles.
“Nervous?” Tyler asks.
“What kind of fucking stupid question is that?”
“Don’t worry, mate. She’ll turn up.”
Oh, right. I forgot to mention that it was Tyler’s brilliant idea to tell her that if she doesn’t want me, I’ll accept the offer back in Dublin. I lied to her just to win her over – like I said earlier, I’m still learning. But I don’t think I’m going to come out of this well, either way.
“Let’s just concentrate on the part you’re good at.”
“Okay.”
“Call a team meeting.”
Tyler does as I say, and the kids huddle around us.
We go over the tactics for the game and I give the defence some final details before letting them all loose onto the field, my threat of a bad report hanging over their heads if they lose – they don’t have to know that I don’t have that kind of power. I sink onto the bench, tensely waiting for the starting whistle.
Carter pulls away from the others and approaches me.
“Everything okay?”
“I wanted to ask you something.”
