“That’s not a problem. There are loads of ways you can get around that.”
“It could be a problem for her.”
Ryan sighs. “Was that why you did it, then?”
“Maybe…I don’t know.”
“We knew you weren’t telling us the truth, but me and Ian had already worked it out. You’re not that difficult to read, you know. Your brain is simple: a binary system, with one synapse.”
“What?”
“You’re predictable and easy to read. Better?”
Ryan’s attempts to act like the older brother would be hilarious, if it wasn’t my life he was trying to fix.
“So. What shall we do?”
“We?”
“Do you want to try doing this by yourself? Let’s face it, Nick. You don’t have the best hand to play.”
“Fuck – have you spoken to Dad, too?”
“Jesus, Nick. Haven’t you figured out yet how it works in this family?”
I let my head flop onto the steering wheel. “She wouldn’t know what to do with someone like me.”
“I’ll give you that.”
“Maybe it was the way we met. It seemed like fate, but…”
“Are you feeling sorry for yourself?”
“A bit.”
“You’re not allowed. Self-pity will get you nowhere.”
“There isn’t anywhere to go.”
“There is, and you know it.”
“I do?” I turn to face him.
“You’re about to lose yourself again.”
“Maybe that’s for the best.”
“I won’t let you. Family, blood, you know, all that stuff…”
I laugh, despite myself.
“Before we go on with anything, I need to know what really happened. I need to understand what we have to avoid so that we don’t ruin everything again.”
“I think you’re moving a little too fast there.”
“And I think you’re losing time. It’s been eight years, Nick. How many more do you want to waste?”
I scoff and shake my head.
