I don’t need to keep looking back.
It’s time to move forwards.
41
Casey
After the first few patients of the day, I make a beeline for the coffee machine. I insert my key card, press ‘cappuccino’, and lean against the wall as it pours, waiting. I rub my eyes, hoping that this irritating headache will disappear soon; otherwise I’ll never make it to the end of my shift.
“Good morning, my dear.”
Martin’s voice hammers through my already-aching skull.
“Martin,” I say by way of greeting, taking my cup of coffee and trying to escape.
“Wait a second. What’s your hurry?”
“I only have ten minutes for my break and I want to enjoy it.”
“Did you not get enough enjoyment last night?”
“What?” I cry, panicked.
Martin points towards my neck, which I touch, instinctively.
“Fell for it, Casey. You’re so obvious.”
“Fuck off, Martin!”
He laughs, grabbing his coffee and stepping closer to me.
“It’s written all over your face: you had sex last night. And it’s not just from the bags under your eyes and the knackered look in your eyes. They’re twinkling. And, I have to say, it really suits you.”
I shake my head, irritated.
“Ten minutes won’t be long enough for the detailed version, but I’m sure it’s enough for you to give me a brief summary.”
“I don’t have to tell you anything.”
“Sure about that? Surely you need to get it off your chest, let it all out…”
“I got quite enough off my chest last night, thanks.”
“I knew it!” Martin throws his arm around my shoulders, forcing me to walk next to him. “Come on. We only have nine minutes left, and I want to hear every little detail.”
* * *
I sitdown on the metal stairs of the fire escape, sipping at my cappuccino. Martin stays standing in front of me, waiting for me to start speaking – but I ignore him, pretending not to have noticed him staring at me, his desperation to know everything about everyone else’s lives.
“Well?” he says finally, his patience vanishing as he glances at his watch. “We’ve wasted another minute!”
“I have nothing to tell you.”
“Casey, don’t make me call around and ask which family members already know the whole story.”
“Are you threatening me?”
“You need it, or you’ll never tell me.”
