“So it meant nothing, then,” Nick says, suddenly serious, after driving in silence for a few minutes. “Just a quick fuck,” he adds.
“Two, to be precise. And I’m sure that was more than enough for you.”
“Fuck, no!” His voice rises a few decibels. “Of course they weren’t enough. Two fucks could never be enough, Casey.”
“What else do you want, then?”
“I want to sleep with you. Only you. And I want to be the only oneyousleep with.”
“Are you trying to tell me I’m a slut?”
“Hell, no! That didn’t come out right.”
“Try and explain yourself better, then. Because you’re about to get a fist to the face.”
He brakes suddenly in the middle of the road, swerving off to the side. Then he loosens his grip on the steering wheel and turns to face me. He takes my face in his hands and leans closer.
“I want to be the only guy you ever want to sleep with.”
I look at him, nibbling at my lip.
“Better?”
“More or less.”
“What about you?”
“What?”
“Do you want to be the only one?”
“How long for?”
Nick pulls back suddenly. “What the fuck is that supposed to mean?”
“Exactly what I said, Nick. How long do you want me to be your only one?”
I take a knife in my hands and wedge it firmly into my heart. I know I’ll never be able to bear his response, but I’d rather hear it now, before I can start to dream again.
Nick sighs and leans closer to me again.
“Is it enough for you to know that I want to do it again? And that now, the thought of dropping you off at home and seeing your beautiful arse walk away from me, of seeing you again at my parents’ house in a few hours, means I’ll have to walk around with my hands tied behind my back? Otherwise, I’d never be able to stop myself from ripping off one of your ridiculous T-shirts.”
I smile, despite myself. “Yeah. I reckon that’s enough.”
He delicately presses his lips against mine. It’s the first time he’s been gentle, almost careful.
“Now, can you please stop talking shit?”
“Well, I’ve been spending a lot of time around the wrong people.”
“Oh yeah?”
“That’s what it looks like.”
He slowly lets me go, turning back to the steering wheel.
“I have to take you home now, or I’ll never be able to.”
