Okay, dear, you’re playing dirty now.
She’s asking me if I think she has nice tits? My God, I know her body centimeter by centimeter and I could live just off of that.
“It’s not important.”
Lie.
“Do you consider me…pretty, Jason?”
“Alex, what the hell are you asking me?”
What the devil kind of question is this?
“Well, yeah, now I mean. Do you still find me beautiful?”
“Please, Alex”
“Just…tell me the truth. I’m not who I used to be. I’m skinny, I don’t have, um, the shape and color I used to have.”
“You’re stupendous, Alex. In my opinion, you are perfect just as you are.”
As she blushes and breaks eye contact I think it makes her look even more attractive.
“Let’s go, I’ll take you home,” I say, getting up and giving her my hand.
“I’m supposed to be sleeping at Rain’s tonight.”
Well, I’m screwed.
I smile at her even though I’ve got a million thoughts bombarding me. I’m thinking about her in my bed again. Her hair on my pillow. Her perfume in my room.
“Is there a problem?” she asks me, getting into the car.
“Absolutely not. Everything’s great.”
What a good actor I am. There ought to be an award for this.
I’m not able to handle this at all. Look at me. It’s obvious that I want her in my arms, in my bed, but I feel like an adolescent with his first crush.
Clumsy, nervous and completely out of control.
I put the key in the lock and open the door for her. My hands are sweaty, even though it’s cold outside. I try to dry them on my jeans, but it doesn’t seem to be working.
“Would you like something?”
“No thank you. I’m tired. Haven’t the others come back yet?”
“No, it’ll be a few more hours at least.”
She nods as she takes off her jacket and set’s it on the banister.
Okay, well, here’s the embarrassing part where I have to pretend like nothing’s wrong and take her to Rain’s room. I swallow hard and block any sexual desire I’m feeling for her and behave like a gentleman.
We head upstairs and with each step I can feel my dignity slip back another stage. As we pass my room Alex hesitates and turns to me as I’m trying not to suffocate on something that seems like a mix of glass shards and pride.
“Can I… can I stay with you?” She bites her lip in embarrassment.
And she even asks me permission?
