Jason and Keith exchange a glance that only promises trouble so I decide to end this as quickly as possible.
“Keith and I were just going for a coffee, so if you don’t mind…” I say, inviting him to make way for us.
“And if I do mind?” he asks with a challenging air in Keith’s direction.
“Friend, what’s the problem? We’re just going—”
“Ah, you want to know what problem I have? Just one: you, shithead, and your fucking arm around her shoulder.”
I close my eyes. Deep breaths. I check the pulse in my heartbeat and it’s rising rapidly. I tell myself to calm down, that this is not the moment to have an attack, here at the door in front of Keith and, damn it, in front of Jay, but my heart is accelerating and won’t slow down.
“Alex, is everything okay?” Keith asks me, whispering in my ear. His tone is calm and he’s almost able to placate these emotions but then I open my eyes and seehisand I’m lost, letting myself be overcome by him again, by my stupid heart and this stupid love.
“Alex?” Jason is speaking to me, Keith is speaking and maybe someone else too, trying to calm everyone down.
I can hear them as if they were a hundred meters away and I’m not able to interact with them, to respond to tell them to knock it off or go to hell because I’m not some toy for them to play with.
“Alex, speak to me…” Jason takes my hand, worried while Keith squeezes my shoulder.
“Take your hand off of her, now.”
“I don’t see why I should.”
“Because you’re scaring her you asshole!”
“Hey.” Keith squeezes me again. “You are the only one here who is scaring her. Get out of here, Jay.”
“I’m not moving.”
“Then I’ll help you.”
“Stop it!” It’s my voice and I can feel it coming out directly from my throat. “Both of you,” I continue, leaving Jay’s hand and gently moving Keith’s hand from my shoulder.
“Alex, are you alright?”
“Can’t you see that she’s not okay, asshole? It’s all your fault.”
“She was fine before you showed up trying to mark territory that doesn’t belong to you.”
Jason breaks out laughing but it stops suddenly.
“You don’t know what you’re talking about, friend. You don’t know anything about me or about her. You don’t know jack shit!”
“I saidenough!” I yell, looking Jason right in the eyes, before walking past him and going to the street where I see Aaron and Liam taking their luggage from a taxi.
“Alex, please don’t go away like this!” Jason follows me and stops my hand that’s ready to open the taxi door.
So I stop, take a deep breath and let him have it.
“You have no rights on me! I am not yours and never have been!” I yell on the verge of tears. “And I never will be!”
He lets my hand go and takes a few steps backwards. His face is a mask of sadness, resentment and remorse.
There was a time when I thought I was his business, that I belonged to him, that I was a part of his world. But that time has passed, it flew away with him the day he decided to let me leave.
Jason and my time is over, there is no way to get it back and bring old things to light now.
“I came back for you,” he says, continuing to look at me. “We didn’t go to the meeting, we gave it up. Each one for his own reason. And you are my reason, Alex.”
