L.D.
I look up to ask Patrick what it means.
“Lily Doyle,” he says, looking at me with a
tenderness that opens my heart and my mind and
makes me understand that we really are at home.
~ ~ ~
Patrick brings Lily to her new crib. She is
sleeping blessedly as I stay on the terrace enjoying
this strange spring sun and looking at the beautiful
countryside in front of the sea, the hills and the
lighthouse in the distance.
Patrick comes up behind me but I don’t turn
around because my heart is beating like crazy and
because I could faint with joy in his arms. He gets
closer and takes my hand, inviting me to sit.
“I know we haven’t talked about this, and
maybe it seems crazy. But Erin, I am sure. I’ve
never been so sure of anything in my life.”
I nod, continuing to shake.
“I believe that for every man, there exists just
one woman able to make him lose his head, make
him set aside all of his previous ideologies and
convictions. Only one woman who is able to teach
him how to love. But I thought that for me it was
different, that for me there was no one, that they
were all the same: all indiscriminate and fuckable
but not lovable. I was sure that for me that train
would not be passing and I was okay with it. But
it’s not like that anymore and I could never think
about going back to how things were.”