the revelation of it is like a slap in the face. It’s as
if the five fingers were imprinted on my cheek and
I can feel it burning.
“Is something wrong?” Patrick asks me after a
few moments of silence.
“I’m just tired. It was a long day and I’d like to
lie down for a bit.”
“Sure, I’ll go with you.”
“No,” I block him right away. “There’s no need
and you have to get back to work. I think you’re
already late,” I say, looking at the clock.
“They can do without me for a few minutes.”
He tries to take my hand but I won’t let him.
He sighs in frustration and rests his head on the
steering wheel. “Won’t you tell me what’s really
going on, Erin?”
“It’s that everything is all wrong, Patrick.
You’re not right for me.” And as I say it a piece of
my heart turns black.
He lifts his head up, searching for my eyes.
“What the fuck?”
“You don’t have to do it, you don’t have to take
someone else’s place. You don’t have any
obligation towards me, you’re not the one who got
me pregnant and it’s not your responsibility,” I say,
closing the conversation as quickly as possible.
“You don’t have to occupy a space that isn’t yours,
or take care of someone that was abandoned by
someone else.”
“Erin…”
