no other place where I could feel every emotion
and every heartbeat directly from the heart.
There’s no other place that I could know that
love, perhaps, does exist.
We kiss until we’re both breathless. I don’t
know if it’s because of the kiss or the fact that I’ve
been holding my breath since I touched down in
Dublin, or the fact that I’m seriously having
trouble getting air in my lungs. So, I lay her down,
wrap her in my arms and keep her safe.
All night, and all those nights to come.
If she wants me.
I squeeze her and give her the sense of security
she needs to face what’s happening to her. I hold
her to me, leaving her to breathe on my bare chest
and let her take my shitty soul, that left alone with
me would have been destined to burn in hell.
And I let her fall asleep like that, while I don’t
make a move, paralyzed by her presence, her
sweetness and her ability to melt a heart in
hibernation like mine.
I don’t close my eyes all night. I want to stay
awake, ready. I don’t want to miss even one of her
breaths.
I place my hands on her round abdomen and an
emotion I’ve never felt before strikes me directly
in the heart. I caress her skin slowly and inhale as
much air as possible to find the courage to go
ahead with this thing, not to pull back, not to hit
the road running as usual.
