“Where are you taking me?”
Nurse Rhodes didn’t answer, only gave an uneasy side-glance.At the end of the hall, she opened one of the metal doors.“This is your room.”She stepped back.
The world tilted, and Nora gripped the door to steady herself.If she didn’t sit soon, she’d collapse onto the floor.Best to know where she should aim before going any further.She peered around the sterile room.A bed with a thin mattress, an even thinner pillow, and a blanket took up one side of the wall.A black book—presumably the Bible—sat on the window ledge, but other than that, nothing.
“I’m sorry, Miss Davis.”Nurse Rhodes’s apology came as she shoved Nora forward and slammed the door.
Nora whirled unsteadily and dove for the handle.She lost her balance, and her face crashed against the cold metal.
The lock clicked into place.
Nurse Rhodes’s voice carried through the bars.“I don’t like starting you in isolation, but Dr.Chalfant thought it best to keep you away from the others until we are certain you are sufficiently compliant.As long as you don’t throw a fit and need to be fully sedated, it will only last until Tuesday.There are two chamber pots beneath the bed for once the purgatives take effect.Food and water will be delivered three times a day.There is an orderly stationed in the hall, but don’t expect to raise a ruckus and get out.Your mother has already tried, and Dr.Chalfant expects the same from you.Please prove him wrong.”
By the sound of the steps, she was leaving.
“Wait!”Nora grasped the bars to support herself.“You said my mum already tried.Is she here?Nearby?”The desperate hope that she might see or hear Mum pushed against the fog.
A warm hand touched Nora’s cold one.“Lie down before you fall down.I put you in the room next to hers, but don’t bother talking to her.She’s kept heavily sedated.I’ll be by to check on you later.”She squeezed Nora’s hand, then theclip, clip, clipof her shoes against the stone floor faded.
Nora stumbled to the bed and crawled beneath the scratchy cover.Was it possible Mum lay directly on the other side?She faced the wall and pressed a hand to its rough texture.Was there any crueler punishment than to finally be near Mum yet unable to touch or talkto her?Mrs.Reed must be proud of her achievement.At least in death, Nora would know the loving arms of Jesus.Here, the only things that wrapped around her were the sounds of her fellow suffering inmates.Healing and hope in an asylum were lies spoken to the naive, and Dr.Chalfant was a fool if he truly expected recovery to occur here.How was Nora ever going to keep her sanity in a place like this?Especially when she wasn’t sure if she should be waiting for Mrs.Reed to appear or if the threat was simply another trick to keep Nora questioning herself.
Chapter Thirty-Four
AN ANGEL’S SONG ROUSEDCONSTANZAfrom the depths of oblivion into an ethereal trance.The melody was so beautiful.So peaceful.And the voice so ...familiar?
Constanza tilted her head to free her other ear from the sound-dampening mattress.
“‘The Lord is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear?The Lord is the strength of my life; of whom shall I be afraid?’”
If she didn’t know better, she’d think Nora was singing to her.An impossibility, but a comfort she’d accept nonetheless.The words of the song reminded her of the psalm Nurse Rhodes had read to her yesterday.Or was it today?With the way sedation blurred the march of time, she couldn’t be sure.Still, the words soothed the nerves tingling back to life from her latest dose.She relaxed back against the mattress.
Between Nora’s parting conversation and Nurse Rhodes’s kindness in reading and explaining the Bible to Constanza, she was beginning to believe the words being sung.There was no one and nothing to fear when the Lord was her light and salvation.He was to be her strength to make it through.She just had to trust Him and restinthat trust.Not that trust would free her from trouble.Nurse Rhodes had been clear on that.Jesus promised His followers there would be trouble, and the saints writing after the Gospels had proven it.Yet no matter the beatings, imprisonments, and persecutions they faced,they had peace and freedom from fear.Constanza wanted to be like them.To have faith like them.To not wrestle with this crushing guilt and fear for Nora’s life.
Maybe this angelic voice that sounded so much like Nora’s was a gift from God.An assurance that Nora was well, not that she was an angel.Constanza shuddered at the thought.No mother wished to outlive her child, but neither did she want Nora to live a life shadowed by fear like Constanza had.Nora deserved better.She deserved a life with Mr.Beaumont, who would provide her the music, joy, and happiness that had been lacking for so long.A life free of the sorrows and dangers Constanza’s choices had produced.So many hours alone had given her time to reflect on her past, Nora’s words, and on the verses Nurse Rhodes had shared.Constanza could feel a change beginning, but she still struggled.Forgiveness could not erase her past or the consequences that reached forward to harm her child.
Lord, it is all my fault, and I’m so sorry.I know I’ve confessed it to You before, but I still feel guilt, and I’m still afraid.Afraid for Nora, for Marcellus, and for myself.I know You’ve forgiven me.Help me.Be my light.My salvation.My strength.Take away my fear.
She lay listening to the verses speak of trusting the Lord in the face of enemies, desiring only to dwell in the house of the Lord, and hiding within His protection in times of trouble.They were reminders that bolstered her soul and proved He was already her light and her strength, and He was intent on replacing that fear with peace, as much as she would allow Him.
“‘Wait on the Lord: be of good courage, and he shall strengthen thine heart: wait, I say, on the Lord.’”
The song ended, and the quiet that followed felt hallowed and special.
“Sing it again!”someone yelled from one of the other isolation rooms.
The voice began again, and it was not interrupted until Constanza’s door opened.
Nurse Rhodes slid into the room, carrying a lunch tray, and quietly shut the door.Her hushed tones spoke of not wanting to overpower the holy moment that filled this forgotten corner of Longview.“Hello, Mrs.Davis.How are you feeling today?”
“Like an angel has come to visit.”She grimaced at the scratchiness in her throat.As much as she hated the tepid gruel, she looked forward to the soothing coating it would create.
Nurse Rhodes chuckled as she arranged the tray on the chair she’d brought in during the last visit.“I imagine most mothers believe their daughters to be angels, and yours has made isolation a place of peace.I never thought that possible.”
Constanza pushed to her elbows, the effort causing a whirl of dizziness.“Nora’s here?”That couldn’t be right.Not unless something bad had happened.
Nurse Rhodes shushed her and helped her to a secure sitting position.“Be at peace.I told you God would not forsake you or your daughter.He has brought her here for safekeeping.”
The familiar grip of panic returned.“Safekeeping?What happened?”
