—Zoe
I return to school two weeks later, even though Pearson said I could take as much time as I need. But I can’t wait anymore.
I want to dance.
My parents and Caleb bring me back to campus. It feels a bit like we’re in a time machine that took us back to my first day, but at the same time, it’s different. Maybe even better, in spite of everything.
My pulse accelerates as my family accompanies me to the dorm. It’s not necessary, but I’m happy to have them with me, and I think they might need this closure for themselves too.
It’s early Monday morning, and I’ll have to hurry to get to my first class on time. The corridors are full, as usual. Students are everywhere. I notice them staring at me as I enter the building, climb the stairs, and finally walk down the hall on the fourth floor to my room.
They’ve heard what happened. Of course they did. How could they not have? Part of me wants to hunch my shoulders and hide. But I have no reason to.
“Are you sure you’re ready?” Mom asks as we reach my room. There’s unmistakable concern in her voice.
I smile, and it’s genuine. “I am. And Dr.Somers also said she thought it would be good for me to come back.”
“I know. It’s just—” Sighing, she stops and shakes her head. “It’s all right. Forget it. It’s just me being worried, that’s all. As usual.” She laughs, but it sounds nervous.
“I’m fine, Mom,” I reassure her, taking my key out of my jacket pocket and unlocking the door.
“That’s wonderful. That’s really good.”
“It is, Mom,” Caleb says, putting an arm around her shoulders. “Zoe will be fine, I know she will. She isn’t alone here.”
“She’s really not.” I turn around when I hear Jase’s familiar voice. My heart flutters when I see him, and a beaming smile appears on my face of its own accord.
He came back yesterday. It was strange to spend the night without him.
“Hey,” I say.
“Hey.” He smiles. I can’t get enough. Of his smile. Of him.
“I guess that’s our cue to disappear,” Caleb says with a theatrical sigh, but then he grins and gives Jase a quick hug.
I don’t know if things will ever be the same between the two of them, but at least they’re talking to each other again. And maybe it doesn’t have to be like it was before. Maybe they need a fresh start, without secrets. Jase told Caleb about Sam. I think it’s good for him to talk about his brother. Every time he mentions him, there’sa little less pain in his eyes. It will never go away, it will always be there, but it’s a different kind of pain now. Because he’s not hiding Sam anymore. He’s remembering him. He remembers the way it used to be. And every time we talk about him, he remembers something else. I’m beginning to understand what Jase meant when he said that Caleb reminds him of Sam.
“You have to go back to school anyway,” Dad says.
“I might as well skip the first class,” Caleb says, making a face. “I hate statistics.”
“You go right ahead and do that, but I have to go to class right now. Unlike you, I don’t like being late,” I say.
“Okay, okay, we’re leaving.” Caleb messes up my hair, and I wrinkle my nose, struggling to hide a smile.
“Will I see you this weekend?” I ask and hug him.
He hugs me so tightly that I can’t breathe for a moment. “Sure. Movie night. I already told Parker.”
“Just what I hoped.”
I let him go and hug Mom and Dad.
“Let us know if you need us,” Mom says, because she can’t help it.
“I will,” I promise.
They hug Jase and then leave us alone.
