“One thing led to another, and before I could blink, he was taking me out on dates and spending every night at the bar just to see me during my shifts. I fell madly in love with him, and I think he fell hard for me, too.” Mom clears her throat as she looks at our joined hands. “Ford started bringing his brother, your father, around, and I got swept up in it all. Maverick was easy to talk to. He was funny, charming, and over-the-moon for me. When he would see me, his face would light up, and it would make the whole world seem brighter, but I didn’t feel as deeply for him as I did for Ford. There was just something about the grouchy, stubborn man that drew me in like a match to a flame. I was his girl through and through.” She blinks quickly, her tears threatening to fall before she swipes at her cheeks. My chest pangs at the pain she must be feeling to relive this. I know it isn’t easy for her. “When I found out about the syndicate, it was because Maverick was trying to convince Ford that the best thing to do was to tell me. They got into a huge fight, and I was thrown right into the middle of it. I had no idea that I was pregnant with you at the time, but when I did finally take the test, I wasn’t on speaking terms with either of them. I remember freaking out and going to the hospital only to have the doctor confirm it. I left feeling like I was going to throw up!”
Rolling my lips in, I nod as she laughs at the bittersweet memory.
“I had to tell them,” she says quietly once her laughter dies down. “I told Ford first, and he stared at me like I had grown two heads. I don’t even think he was breathing as I tried to snap him out of his shock. Once he came to, he was overjoyed. We weren’t ready to be parents, but no one ever is. We were overflowing with love to give you, and we told Maverick together. I’ll never forget the pain I saw on his face.” Her expression becomes distant as her mirth fades. “He was always good at keeping up appearances, but that dayhe couldn’t smile to save his life. It’s something I’ll never forget…” She squeezes my hands in hers. “When it got down to discussing our next move, Ford wouldn’t give up the syndicate. He wouldn’t abandon this organization, and he had the grand idea of me becoming a part of it. As a new mom, the thought of putting you in danger scared me so badly that I couldn’t agree. I couldn’t potentially risk your life formyhappily ever after. I don’t regret my decision because it kept you safe, but I do regret keeping this from you, Addie.” Her lip wobbles as she closes her eyes in pain. “I’msosorry, sweetheart. I did what I could to keep you from making the same mistakes I did. I wanted so much better for you, and in the process, Ihurtyou.”
I shake my head, my own tears falling now. The anger I felt fades as I gather her shoulders in my arms and squeeze her to me in a crushing hug. “You did what you thought was right, and I can’t fault you for that. I’m still angry, but I understand why you did it now…”
She hugs me tightly, turning her face into my hair. “I wanted so much better for you, baby. I’m so sorry.”
“It’s okay,” I whisper. When we pull away, I see the maternal doting and affection gleaming in her eyes. She’s always been my biggest supporter, which is what makes this next part so easy for me to say. “Mom…”
She gets a knowing look on her face as she brushes my hair behind my ear. “You love him, don’t you?”
I nod, words eluding me. I can’t piece together what I feel for Rowan in simple terms. In my mother’s words, I was swept up into it, and I don’t want to let go of something so grand.
Rowan is my person, and judging by the glint on my mother’s face, she knows it too.
“You look at him the way I used to look at Ford,” she says softly. “I see it. I see both of you.”
My heart swells with joy, but at my core, I’m still her little girl, afraid of getting in trouble. I don’t think that feeling will ever go away. “Are you upset?”
She sighs, glancing at the certificate on the desk. “Honey,I’ve only ever wanted you to be happy. If Rowan Kingsley is the one who makes you happy, then I want you to grab hold of him and never let go. I want to see you make it.”
“We will,” I promise, my heart calling to the man downstairs who tangled me up tightly in his web.
Mom nods, fighting back more tears. “It’s important that you both choose each other. Even when things get hard…”
“We do, Mom,” I say with conviction. “Rowan has made me the center of his world, and he’s the center of mine. I’ve never felt this way about anyone.”
She smiles. “Iknow, sweetheart. I only ever dreamed of seeing you this happy. Now it’sreal.”
As we share this warmth between us, I can’t help but think about the lingering thought that plagues me.
Did she ever get over Ford?
“Mom…” I follow her eyes, making her look at me as I ask the burning question. “Do you still have feelings for Ford?”
Her face falls a fraction, and something passes behind her gaze. “I… I don’t know…”
I squeeze her hands in mine, grounding her. “You can tell me the truth. It won’t upset me.”
Truthfully, I don’t know how to feel about all of this. Uncertainty and concern tug at me, but I know this is hard for her. Leaving the past behind is never easy. If I’m finding my happiness, then why can’t she?
She shakes her head, bottom lip bobbing as her words catch in her throat. "I loved your father, Addie. We weren’t picture perfect, but he understood me better than anyone. I miss him…"
“I miss him too,” I say quietly. “But it’s been years, Mom. If you’re ready to move on, thenmove on.”
She gives a nervous chuckle, her eyes glancing around the room as if she can’t look at me while she makes excuses. “It’s been seventeen years!”
“I know that,” I bounce her hands on my knees, drawing her full attention back to me. “But you can’t keep living in thepast. Yes, you and Dad loved each other, but there’s someone else in your life who seems to still harbor those feelings for you…”
For the first time in my entire existence, the great Morgan Bright looks stunned speechless by my proclamation. It’s almost comical to see the wide gape of her mouth. It’s short-lived as she slams her lips shut and levels me with a raised brow.
“He doesn’t feel that way about me. He moved on, too.”
I roll my eyes. “And where is Aunt Marissa now?”
“Addie!” Mom scolds as I bring up the distant aunt who skipped town the moment she had Logan. It’s no secret that the woman wanted nothing to do with us. She didn’t even give Ford so much as a goodbye when she left him clueless on how to raise a newborn at the local hospital.
