Connor shoves the box back into his pocket before taking a sip of his drink like nothing happened. Thalia and Alana sit back down, having a heated discussion about my sister still being logged into the intel experts' accounts. I know it won't be dropped until someone finally takes action, but they’ll bicker until something new comes along.
I’m so lost in my own head, I nearly jump when Thalia leans toward me. “I know what you’re doing.” She whispers. “You only drink like this to forget—”
“Don’t say it.” I cut her off before chugging the rest of my beer. “Let me have this, Thalia.”
She nods, sitting back and joining in on the conversationas I order two more beers. By the end of the night, my head is so fuzzy I can't see straight. I know I’m going to be hungover, but I’m not wallowing in self-pity anymore. Besides the inebriation, I feel the lightest I have in a long time.
“Come on, big guy,” Alana pats my shoulder. “Connor and I are going to help you get home.”
“Who’s going to help me?” Noah slurs.
Thalia smacks the back of his head. “Stand up. I'm not carrying you.”
“Aw,” Noah pouts before reaching for my sister. She side-steps him, rolling her eyes as he drags himself upright.
I balance myself as I stand, cautious not to fall over the table as the room spins. I close my eyes, gathering my bearings before following Alana and Connor outside. When the crisp nighttime air hits me, those thoughts of Addison creep back in, and I realize that even in my drunk state, I can't escape her. Everything reminds me of her. Her smile, her snarky attitude, and her light that shines bright in the darkest caverns.
Hell, I don't know if I want to stop thinking of her. I’m forcing myself all for the sake of the compound, but it isn't hurting anyone. She’ll be here soon enough, and I’ll have to avoid her so I don't do something stupid.
“How are you holding up?” Connor asks as we trudge through the grass and cross a few properties.
“I can feel the headache starting,” I say, wincing at the loudness of my voice.
Alana hums. “You didn't drink as much as I thought you would have.”
Because we didn't stay long enough for me to keep drinking.
I make a low sound in my throat, neither agreeing nor disagreeing with her.
“Now that we're alone,” Connor gives me a pointed look.
I've been so afraid to speak this out loud for fear of making it real, but it’s already rooted so deep that I'm drinking to forget a woman I just met. It’s too real for me to stop myself. “How did you two know you were in love?”
They stop, sharing a sheepish look.
“Well, I knew I was in love with Connor when he woke up the morning of my birthday and helped my mom and dad set up my surprise party.” Alana smiles fondly.
Connor returns her look. “And I knew I was in love with Alana the first time she laughed at a joke I cracked. She was in tears over the fucker she was dating, forgetting her birthday. I did everything I could to make her smile. When she gave me that watery laugh, I knew I was done for.”
They’ve both just admitted they fell for each other in their senior year of high school, but I know what followed was years of them avoiding each other. I’m still not sure what happened, but it led them here.
It gives me a bit of hope. Not much, but it’s something to hold onto.
They drop me off at home, and I tell them good night before slumping at my desk and blinking the bleariness from my eyes as I organize and complete two reports while still drunk.
I’ve fallen asleep so many times at this desk that I know when my shoulders curl forward that I'm heading right toward that path. I lay my head down on top of a stack of papers, and as my eyes close, brown hair and hazel eyes greet me in my dreams.
And I welcome them with open arms.
Chapter Four
Rowan
I’m awoken to the sound of my phone blaring as my ringtone cuts through the fog of my brain. My eyes shoot open, and the dull ache in my temples makes me groan. The harsh mid-day light is cutting through the window, and I forgot to close the curtains.
I clear my throat, my mouth unbelievably dry as I sit up and close my eyes. I grab my phone and answer.
“What?”
