No.
It’s more than that.
He thinks I’mchoosingto leave them.
“I need someone reliable,” he says, his voice colder now. “Someone who’s going to follow through on their commitments. Not some irresponsible little girl who?—”
I turn to leave.
I don’t need to listen to the rest.
I’ve heard this all before.
Somany times over.
The people in my life, the people who are supposed to love me realizing…
I’m not what they want.
I’m not responsible enough or successful enough or smart enough or…
I’m just…not enough.
So I let the silence fill up with all the things I’m not prepared to say.
The worst part is that some stupid, traitorous part of me still wants him to take it all back, for him to tell me he doesn’t mean it.
He doesn’t.
So I hold the stack of papers in my hands tighter, turn toward the door.
But something stops me, and I spin back, searching his eyes.
I don’t know what I want to find there, what I’m hoping will magically appear…
But all I find in the deep brown depths of his gaze is?—
The truth.
He doesn’t think I’m enough either.
Crack.
I swear I actually feel my heart fracture, and when I look down, I almost expect to see my chest ripped open, to find myself bleeding out.
But I’m whole.
I close my eyes at that agonizing lie, at the painful irony.
Then I blow out a breath, peel back my lids, keep holding the stack of applications for my fucking replacement, and…I walk out of his office.
At least I can make sure Chloe gets someone nice.
Someone who’ll love her.
Because Rhodes has made it very clear I won’t be around to do that.
I make it as far as the kitchen where I see my notebook, see the travel plans I’ve been working on so painstakingly, and my knees nearly give way.
