Eli gave a dry laugh at that. “Considering I’ve only ever been in one relationship and that whatever this is between us already feels better than anything I’d felt during my four years with my ex, yeah, yeah, I think I’ve felt something different. Special.”
“Special’s the right word.” I cocked my head. I wanted to go on, but something about the way Eli’s face turned downward tipped me off. Shifters were well-versed in understanding body language, as it was our only form of communication in our animal forms. “What happened with your ex?”
He sighed and started to play with the scrambled eggs on his plate. He shuffled them around with the fork. “Whatdidn’thappen with my ex? I feel like there’s so much to say, and I don’t want to talk about any of it.”
I tensed a fist. I could see there was pain in Eli’s eyes as he looked out the window. I gave him a moment to collect his thoughts before he continued. “We started off great. We met on a blind date, actually, set up by someone he worked with. My career was just beginning to take off, so I think I was distracted at first, and I didn’t see the red flags. And they were there. He had control issues and some anger problems that got worse and worse after he lost his job. We were already together for three years, and I was making enough to support us both. But I think the stress of his job—he’s a surgeon—it just made him spiral, and the fights between us got worse and worse.” He rubbed the bridge of his nose, wincing.
I needed to ask. Needed to know if I’d be hunting this coward down and making him pay. “Eli, did he hurt you?”
“No, no. Not physically. But there was emotional abuse that I think’s left me with some heavy baggage. There was a lot of ways, looking back now, that he manipulated me. Cut me off from people, belittled me. It started to affect me on the ice. I was making mistakes and then hearing him call me a dumbass, and I’d just lose my head. He also did shit like refuse to give me any kisses or touches, and I’m a touchy guy; I like that kind of thing. But he’d hold it back from me. Sex too. Would say things like he just wasn’t feeling me, that I wasn’t turning him on.”
My jaw dropped. Anger steamed up to a boil inside me. “Are you fucking kidding me? He sounds like an immature idiot, Eli. I’m sorry you ever dealt with that pathetic excuse for a man.”
Eli lifted his eyes. A curl of dark brown hair fell on his forehead. How the fuck could anyone want to belittle orhurt this golden human being? It was beyond me. A complete mystery. “Thank you. My confidence definitely took a hit, but I’ve been working on building it back up. It was my decision to break up with him. Seeing him groveling and crying to have me back was a nice consolation prize, at least.” He sucked in a deep breath and smiled at me from across the table. “So yes, to answer the original question again, this feels very different.”
“It’s because it is, Eli. There’s something else that’s unique about shifters.”
“Besides the whole animal and healing things?”
“Yes, besides that. We also have something called ‘fated mates.’ It’s pretty much what it sounds like. Not much is known aboutwhyit happens, and not even everyone in the shifter community believes it exists. I’d actually been a little doubtful about it, even though I’ve met people in fated relationships before. Maybe it was my way of protecting myself, since the odds of finding a fated mate aren’t exactly high.”
Eli’s eyebrows started to rise, creeping up his forehead. “Are you saying…”
“I didn’t think it’d ever happen to me,” I continued. “I doubted it. Thought I’d be fine living life on my own. And then you showed up. I scented you from miles away. When I saw you, my heart did a complete somersault. And last night, when I fucked you for the first time, all my doubts were gone. Disappeared. I knew deep down that you’re my fated mate, Eli.”
He blinked a couple of times. Shook his head. “What does that… what’s that mean exactly?”
“It means you and I are meant to be,” I said, grinning. “I know it’s a lot, but?—”
“No,” Eli said. He sat up and straightened his shoulders,tensed muscles rippling with the movement. “It… it makes sense. It’s so fucking weird to say, but I believe you. I think I felt it too. Not in the same way. I didn’t smell you from miles away—if I did, then I’d be worried, scared, and ordering you an overnight shipment of Dove soap and deodorant—but I have felt a connection with you, and you explaining this fate mates thing… it explains why I’ve literally been dreaming about you every single night. Why I can’t stop thinking about you during the day, sneaking glances at you whenever we’re out together with the team.” A flush crept up his chest, over his neck. “And last night. Not just the sex, but the sleeping together, the little jokes we had this morning, the grade A dicking down you gave me over and over again.”
I laughed at that, even though hearing this made me want to jump out of my chair and cheer.
He felt it. He knew it too.
“But,” Eli said, suddenly taking an arrow straight through my joy with a single word, “this whole ceremony thing. That, that’s something I don’t know about. Not yet.”
I nodded. “I can completely understand that.” Without the ceremony, we wouldn’t officially be mates, and the bond wouldn’t seal. Could we continue to date each other without tying our souls together? Sure, but from what I understood, there would always be a yearning for that completeness, and the yearning many times would fester into anger and bitterness.
Not great. But also not something I was going to bring up. I didn’t want to in any way pressure him into this decision, and he’d been through a hell of a lot in these last twenty-four hours. “Let’s take it one step at a time,” I said, reaching over and placing a hand on his. He looked down with a smile. I rubbed his hand undermine. “Let’s finish up breakfast, and then we can take some photos outside. Unless you had other plans today?”
Eli’s hazel-green eyes met mine. He grinned wide enough to cause them to crinkle at the corners. “If I did, then they’d be canceled.”
“Good,” I said. “Because I want you all to myself today.”
Chapter Twenty-Two
Ready to Blow
ELI
Our head coach,Julian, stood in front of the room, pointing at the video projected on the screen and talking about how weak our defense was last night. The assistant coach sat on the table, nodding and whispering something to the video coach before the video from last night’s game started playing again.
Normally, these team video sessions were helpful in getting me to pick up on mistakes I may not have even realized I was making. On my last team, the coaches were brutal about pointing out each and every little misstep. It trained me to always pay attention because you never knew when the focus was going to shift to you.
“Eli? Hello?” Dylan whispered next to me, nudging me with an elbow.
I looked to see Coach Julian staring me down.
