A sheepish grin pulled at my lips. “I might have already done some research into other competitive swimming avenues.”
“Such a stalker,” she teased, just as the boat lifted over a wave, and rain started pelting the windows. She stiffened under my hand, her head whipping to look out at the blackened sky.
“I hate storms,” she muttered, her voice wavering.
“I know.”
That made her turn to me, face pale, but curious. “You do?”
“It’s somewhat obvious from your body language.”
“You’ve made a study of my body language?” she asked.
“Catnip, I can’t seem to take my eyes off you whenever you’re in my vicinity … I’ve had no choice.” I squeezed her knee, warm under the hand that hadn’t left it since I sat down with her. Her eyes dropped to it, lashes fluttering against her cheek as she blinked.
“I feel like you’re cheating.”
I frowned. “Cheating? I don’t understand.”
She huffed out a dark laugh. “You’re the one who set the ‘platonic-in-private’ rule, but when you say things like that, in that blunt, honest way of yours … it feels anything but platonic to me.”
My heart vibrated in my chest. “I … I apologise. I promise there was no intent to … I don’t have any expectations?—”
“I know you don’t,” she muttered, shifting her knee so my hand fell away. “And that’s the problem.”
With those confusing words, she stood, collected the empty plate and headed for the kitchen without looking back. I was left with a fluttering stomach, and an aching chest, my palm cold from the lack of her skin next to mine.
CHAPTER FORTY-TWO
Like a Noose
IRINA
Why did I have to walk away from him right as the storm hit?
I curled myself into a ball, hugging my blanket tighter as the yacht swayed, and the rain beat a drumming rhythm on the windows, and the memories beat a rhythm on the inside of my skull.
I didn’t even have the comfort of Abernathy to help me get through what was going to be an absolute shit of a night. Henry had given them a pill each to help them relax, and they were safely locked away in their cat crates.
Where was my special pill to help me relax? I conveniently ignored the fact that I never took so much as paracetamol unless I was on the verge of dying. These were extenuating circumstances.
Storms made me think of Andrei, and those thoughts were like a noose tightening around my neck.
I forced those thoughts from my head. I had to get through this night without letting the memories take over. I turned my thoughts to Henry. Was he trying to make it impossible for me to survive until our two-year expiry date? Why did he have to say things that made these feelings in me swell, and blossom, and … hope?
And why did I wish that when I’d confronted him about it, he’d leaned in and kissed me instead of apologising? I groaned into theblanket. Kissing—and all the other things I’d like to be doing with him—would be the definition of stupid, since neither of us wanted to be honest about what it meant.
It had begun to mean something important to me, but there was no way I was putting that out there. Not when he was trying so hard to do the right thing, to stick to the plan, to work towards the end game. But what if the right thing had changed in the course of us getting to know one another over the last couple of months?
The boat lurched, and my breath caught in my throat. It was followed by a flash of lightning that illuminated the room and a boom of thunder seconds later, close enough that I felt the vibrations of it in my bones.
My chest constricted, my limbs locked with terror. And the memory surged …
… a princess sat stiff-backed at a dining table littered with fine china plates, crystal goblets and silver cutlery while she stared down at herPapana?i, unable to stomach it.
This guest of Uncle’s was looking at her. No, more than just looking … it felt like his gaze was raking her body with sharp fingernails, burrowing under her skin and leaving cold tendrils there.
“She’s a beauty, Bogdan,” he said, his voice slick like oil. Under the table, Stefan took her hand. “She seems quite … docile.”
