I sit back, giving her as much honesty as I feel able to. “I feel numb, honestly. Like my veins are filled with ice.” My eyes go to the windshield, staring blindly outside. “I just keep wondering how I turned into this girl. The one who lets a guy treat her like shit so she doesn’t lose him.” I huff out a laugh, but there’s no humor in it. “Girls like me don’t get happy endings, and I never should have—” My chin starts quivering again, and I sink my teeth into my bottom lip.
“Stop that!” Bridget snaps, reaching over to grab my forearm and shaking me. “You are not the woe-is-me girl, and this…You won’t let him turn you into that. None of this is your fault. Trusting him does not make you wrong or stupid orwhatever. Him abusing that trust? That makes him an asshole, and that’s it.” She goes still, her eyes flaring. “Paisley came here to return his phone,” she realizes slowly. “Did she just want to tell you that she was with him last night?”
“Yes.” I exhale sharply. “With Nick…or not. Who knows?”
Bridget slams a hand against the steering wheel. “That utter fucking cunt.” A wet snort escapes me, and she glares at me. “I don’t care that we don’t blame the women. This is just?—”
“Cunt behavior?” I ask wryly, and she nods vigorously. But as quickly as the moment lightens, it goes dark again. “Do you think they slept together last night?” The words taste acrid on my tongue, but the question is plaguing me, wondering how far it went.
I think about how his eyes have been dancing away from mine, like he can’t bear to hold my stare for too long, or I will see the truth.
“I don’t know, Gracie.” Bridget’s eyes are sympathetic, and I can’t stand it. I look away, tucking my shaking hands under my thighs. After a moment, she sighs, putting the car into gear and pointing us toward her home. “I wasn’t kidding about you coming home with me.”
“Okay,” I whisper, grateful to have her. The idea of going back to my apartment alone is enough to have bile surging into my throat. “What do I do now? It’s Christmas tomorrow. I’m supposed to go to his family’s house and pretend everything is normal.”
She doesn’t say anything for the longest time. “You could just stay with me.”
I open my mouth to accept, but then shake my head. “Is it stupid to want to go? Raewyn and Stephen…They gave me the first Christmas that ever made me feel like I was part of a family.”
Bridget thumps her head against the headrest. “Gracie, you’re killing me right now.” She eases to a stop at anintersection, her eyes watery as she looks over at me. “I don’t like crying, so ifyoucould stop, that would be great.”
My smile is wavering. “I’ll try.”
Her shoulders lift with her next breath, and then the car is moving forward again. “You want one last taste? Of Christmas, I mean.”
I scrunch my brows together. “That’s one way to put it, I guess. I don’t know if that’s dumb, but I could also…” Pain flares in my chest, making my breath hitch. “I could talk to Braxton there. Neutral ground. I don’t…I can’t go to his apartment, and I don’t want him at mine.”
“Don’t do it,” Bridget urges. “I’ve got two girlfriends driving over from Ashland to have a ‘Friendmas’ with me, and you have an open invitation. You don’t need to do this to yourself, Gracie. You just don’t, especially on Christmas.”
My teeth chatter together, torn, knowing she’s right, but… “It’s my way of pretending for one more day, and then?—”
“Gracie…”
“And then I’ll say goodbye.”
Bridget mutters a curse. “Oh, we’re getting so drunk tonight.” She turns a corner and sits forward with a frown. “Isn’t that…?”
“What?” She points, and I follow her finger, realizing we’re on Oak Street. The house—myhouse—is sitting there, like usual, but the For Sale sign has a bigSOLDsticker plastered over it. “I don’t understand,” I say numbly. “He hasn’t said a word.”
Bridget taps her fingers against the steering wheel. “Do you think he was…I don’t know…saving it as a surprise? For tomorrow?”
I blink at her. “‘Merry Christmas, I cheated on you. Here, have a house’?” Confusion is battering at my grief and pain, leaving me at a loss as to what I should be feeling.I shake it off. “I can’t think about it right now,” I mutter. “It doesn’t matter anyway, right? That house was supposed to be ours, so it’s already gone anyway.”
“Gracie—”
“I could really use that drink right about now,” I interrupt, giving her a tight smile. She watches me for a beat before dropping her chin.
“You got it.”
CHAPTER 16
Gracie
Iarrive at Raewyn and Stephen’s not long after Braxton, and he’s on me almost immediately. I remain limp in his arms, realizing quickly that it was never my calling to be an actress, turning my face to the side when he tries to kiss me.
“I went by your place last night,” he murmurs. “You weren’t home.”
I lift my eyebrows. “I messaged you and told you I was spending the night with Bridget. Didn’t you get it?” My tone is frosty, and Braxton steps back with a frown, his green eyes searching mine.
