I laugh softly, sliding my leg over his so I’m straddling him, my arms around his neck. “You do know,” I say. “You’ve lived it, and so did I. I think the difference is that living without each other is like…” I trail off, trying to think of a way to describe it. “It’s like living in a world of gray when we know what it’s like to live with color.”
“That’s pretty poetic.” Braxton hooks his hands around my neck, drawing me close. “And so fucking true. I don’t ever want to lose you again, Gracie.”
I smile. “So don’t,” I say simply.
“You make it sound so easy, but it scares the shit out of me, knowing how much I hurt you. If you had asked me a year ago if I was capable of doing that, I would have laughed you right out the door.” His green eyes are bright with sincerity, and I brush my thumb over his lips.
“That’s why I trust you,” I admit in a whisper.
Braxton huffs. “Why? Because I’m scared.”
“Sort of.” I waggle a hand in the air. “Feeling that terror?” I tap a finger against his chest. “It means youknow you have something to lose, and I know that you’re not going to let that happen.” I pause. “Are you?”
“No,” he says firmly, sitting up, our chests pressed together and his hand tangling in my hair. “I’m going to keep working with Stevie, keep going to the counselor. I’m going to check in. With you, with Dad, with my crew. I’m never going to assume that I have a handle on it, never overestimate my ability to carry the burden on my own.” He closes his eyes, dropping his head to my shoulder. “I’ll never give pieces of myself to someone else. They belong to you.”
My heart feels like it might burst out of my chest, thinking about everything that’s happened to get us to where we are. I know the blame doesn’t solely lie on Braxton’s shoulders, or even Paisley’s, but I have hope now that we are capable of moving past everything to create something new together.
“I’ve been responsible for myself for such a long time, and it’s scary to lean on someone. To trust them and believe they’ll catch me if I fall.” Braxton doesn’t say a word, just watching me. “I think that we both got so lost, trying to protect ourselves, that we forgot to lean on each other.” I smile, leaning down to brush my nose against his. “I’m leaning now,” I whisper. “And I trust you to catch me.”
“I won’t ever let you fall again.” Braxton’s throat moves on a swallow. “And that’s something you can absolutely trust.”
Epilogue
GRACIE
Five months later
“This isn’t a cocktail bar,” Benson grumbles, his arms crossed over his chest as he watches Randi add a piece of pineapple to the glass of the Malibu sunset.
She shoots him a dirty look as she sets the glass down in front of me, Analise already sipping her blue lagoon. “You told me I could do it,” she reminds waspishly. “And you told me you weren’t going to hover.”
“I’m not hovering.” Randi pointedly looks down at where his feet are planted—directly behind her with a distinct lack of personal space. “This is my bar,” Benson argues. “I can stand where I like.”
“No, you can’t,” Randi counters. “Go back to your office. Your face is scaring off customers.”
I snort into my drink, and Randi’s mouth curves into a smirk—one that only widens when Benson growls and stomps away, the door to his office slamming behind him a second later. She turns to us, asking politely, “Can I get you anything else?”
“No, we’re good,” Analise laughs. “Thanks, Randi.” We grab our glasses and find a quiet table on the other side of the bar, and I sigh appreciatively as I sink into my chair. It was nonstop at work today, a bunch of people seemingly having forgotten that they want flowers as part of their Christmas decorations until the last minute.
“Where are Nick and Braxton?” Analise asks curiously.
I roll my eyes. “Playing video games and drinking beer,” I say dryly. “Their pre-Christmas boys’ night.”
“Sounds thrilling,” she says dryly, her eyes on mine. “How are you feeling? Last Christmas was…” She trails off, making aneekface.
“You’re not wrong.” I trail a finger over a smooth knot in the wood, thinking about everything that’s happened this last year. “I’m…” I inhale deeply, filling my lungs. “I’m good. Braxton and I have been a lot more open about how we’re feeling and where our heads are at. He’s been hinting that he’s ready to move forward, but he’s not pushing me, letting me decide what pace we move at.”
“I’m glad my brother didn’t completely destroy the best thing that ever happened to him,” Analise observes thoughtfully. “It would have sucked if we had to kick him out of the family.”
I can’t help the laugh that spills out, and she grins back at me, eyes gleaming. “What about you?” I demand. “You’re finally back home. Are you happy about that?”
Analise moved back to Sterling Creek not long after my birthday, and she’s working hard to get her new editing business off the ground. “I am,” she murmurs. “Everything feels like it’s just fallen into place.” There’s nothing in her words that give me pause, but her green eyes have dimmed slightly, not quite meeting mine. “I need to move out of Mom and Dad’s place. I don’t mind living with them, but I need some space for myself.”
“That’s understandable,” I murmur. “It’s a big adjustment, going from living by yourself, even in dorms, to moving back in with your parents.”
“Right?” Analise takes a long, healthy sip of her drink before setting it back down, continuing, “Privacy? No way! Boundaries? They don’t know the meaning of the word.”
I lean forward with interest. “That sounds like youneedprivacy and boundaries. Is there something you’re not telling me?”
