I turn to the girl beside him, and she looks completely confused. I can tell she has no idea what’s happening, and for a moment my anger softens just a little. If she’s caught up in whatever Sebastian is doing, she probably doesn’t even realize it yet.
“I won’t tell you what to do,” I say to her, my voice quieter now, “but if you need help getting away from him, I live in the Windham dorm.” I’d help her even if she came and found memonths from now. I don’t want anyone to feel how I feel in this moment.
Her brows knit together slightly, clearly trying to process what I’m saying.
“I mean it,” I add softly, and then I step back and turn to leave before either of them can respond. My heart is pounding so hard it feels like it might crack through my ribs. When the adrenaline fades, something colder settles into its place.
Now that I’m walking away, the moment keeps replaying in my head. The way he looked at me like he was so cold, almost like he’d never seen me before in his life. The way he held himself, too. He seemed poised, controlled, not the crash out I’m used to. Does he have different personalities for all of his girlfriends?
The worst part is the ache still sitting in the center of my chest even though I’m furious with him.
I’m so mad at myself.
Mad that I trusted him.
Mad that I let myself fall for him so quickly.
I’m halfway back to my dorm when I get a text from Sebastian.
Game is starting soon. I’m headed out on the field, baby. I can’t wait to see you.
I’m going to black out. Seriously, I’m going to finally snap. He’s clearly playing games with me. I block his number and start to put my phone back in my pocket. But then something occurs to me. If he didn’t want the other girl to know what was going on with me, and now he’s playing with my head to see how far he can push things, he’s probably going to pop up at my dorm when the game is over.
I tap out a quick text to Juniper.
I don’t want to be home tonight, so let’s go to that party when you’re finished watching the rugby game.
I pass Ronan and I have to compose myself because I don’t want to take things out on him that aren’t his fault.
“Are you okay, Liv?” he asks, and this is exactly what I’m talking about. No one has ever called me Liv. Why is he starting now? It sounds stupid, but that irks me so much.
“I’m okay, just a long day. I’m headed home to get some rest,” I say, thinking he will take the hint, but he doesn’t.
“Do you want some company?” he smiles, turning so he’s facing the same direction I’m headed in now.
I’m going to scream.
I hold it together enough to say, “I’m actually going to take a hot shower and see if I can get this headache to go away.” I think that will do it. I think that will be enough, but it’s not.
“I don’t mind. I can hang in your room and wait for you, or sit on the sink and talk to you while you shower.” I’m seriously going to throw up on him. I’m going to knee him in the crotch and puke on him when he’s lying there in pain.
I hate it here.
I start to tell him no, but we’re interrupted by Soph who seems to be headed to work by the way she’s dressed. I’m not sure why she’s on campus because she doesn’t go to school here, but I’m so thankful to see her.
“You’re a creep, and I mean that with as much offense as possible,” she says, grabbing my arm and pulling me with her. She looks at me, “You don’t have to be nice to guys like that. I heard what he said to you.”
I don’t turn around to see if Ronan is still there or if he went off to lick his wounds, but I do say, “Thanks. It’s been a shitty day.”
“Where are you headed?” she asks, and I point over at my dorm.
“Lock your door, that fucker is a creep,” she says with a laugh, but I can tell she’s serious.“I’m gonna be late for work, she you later!” she yells, taking off at a jog in the direction of The Red Boot.
My phone buzzes, and it’s a text from Juniper.
Yay! I’ll come find you right after the game.
I send her one more, just to be sure.
