He leaves.
I sit there, staring at nothing.
Two options. Both terrible.
Betray Gemma to save the family.
Or destroy the family to protect her.
Antonio's voice echoes in my head: "Promise me you'll do what's necessary. For the family. Always for the family."
I promised.
But what if doing what's necessary means losing the only person who makes me feel human?
It's past midnight when I finally go to our bedroom.
Gemma is in the bathroom. I hear retching.
I'm through the door before I can think. How fucking dare she do this? Now?
Is this the reason she's so thin?
She's on the floor, hugging the toilet, body shaking. Her face is pale, hair plastered to her forehead with sweat.
"What the fuck, Gemma?"
She waves me off. "Go away." I notice her hand is shaking.
I reach for her, but she kicks out her leg, stopping me.
"Seriously?" I snap. I want to strangle her. Maybe, I'll kill her, and then, all my fucking problems would be solved. But I can't. The idea makes me want to join her in spilling my guts into the toilet. "Antonio's not even cold in the ground, and you are starting this shit."
She wipes the back of her mouth with a shaky hand. "What?" she asks. I notice her eyes are glazed, and there's a sheen of sweat on her forehead.
"Why are you vomiting?"
She looks at me like I'm stupid. "I'm sick."
"Really?" My voice is laced with sarcasm. "You were fine earlier."
She goes to argue with me, all we seem to do these days, but before she can speak, she's retching in the bowl. Nothing comes up, but she gags, tears streaming down her face, as she tries to catch her breath.
I'm by her side immediately. "Easy," I say, rubbing her back.
She looks up at me, snot and tears on her face.
"How long have you been sick?"
"I don't know. A couple of days. A week?" She's trembling. "It comes and goes. Must be stress."
I press my hand to her forehead. No fever, but she's clammy from the vomiting. "Any other symptoms?"
She shakes her head. "Not really." She leans back against me. "I need to go to the doctor but with everything…"
"Have you eaten today?"
"I tried. Couldn't keep it down, and I needed to be able to stand by your side."
