I shove at his chest. It's like pushing a wall. "You were going to throw me away anyway! You made it clear well before I overheard you. You've been planning to get rid of me, so I might as well get something out of it," I sneer.
"You get something? What exactly do you get, Gemma?" His hand slams into the wall beside my head. "Alexei's protection? His respect? You think he won't break you the second you aren't useful?"
"Like you're doing?"
"I never—" He stops himself and takes a deep breath. "You heard a dying man's delirium and my attempt to placate him. And instead of coming to me, instead of asking me what I meant, you ran straight to my enemy."
"You said 'I promise'!" My voice breaks. "You promised him you'd do 'what's necessary'!"
"To manage Antonio's final wishes! To handle the succession! Not to fucking divorce you!" He's shouting now, control slipping. "You insane woman, you heard what you wanted to hear so you could justify betraying me!"
"I didn't betray you?—"
"You gave intel to Alexei Morozov!" His other hand hits the wall on my other side, caging me in. "You didn't get what the fuck you wanted, so you went elsewhere like a stupid fucking child. Thank God you aren't pregnant!"
His words sting, and I'm crying now. Hot, angry tears stream down my cheeks.
"You pushed me away! You treated me like I was too fragile, too useless?—"
"I was protecting you!"
"I didn't ask for protection! I asked to be your partner!"
"And I said no! Which apparently means you burn everything to the ground!" His face is inches from mine. "What did you think would happen here, Gemma? You'd give Alexei everything, he'd pat you on the head and call you clever, and then what? You'd go home to me? Live happily ever after as the woman who destroyed both our families?"
His words hit me right in the gut. He's right. I knew it the moment I went to Alexei. No good could come from siding with him, and yet…I did it anyway.
"I wasn't thinking?—"
"No shit you weren't thinking!" He's breathing hard, eyes wild. "You were feeling. Hurt. Angry. Scared. So, you made theworst possible decision because that's what you do when you're emotional! It's why I can't fucking trust you."
"Fuck you!"
"Fuck you back!" His hand fists in my hair, yanking my head back. "You want to know what I promised Antonio? I promised I'd keep this family together. I promised I'd secure the succession. And I promised I'd do whatever it takes to make that happen. Which includes keeping my impulsive, reckless wife from getting us all fucking killed."
"Then why didn't you just say that?" My voice is raw. "Why didn't you tell me?—"
"Because I don't fucking answer to you!"
He lets go of me and I stumble. "You do fucking answer to me!" I snap.
We're both breathing hard. Staring at each other. The air between us is electric, crackling with rage and fear and something darker.
"What were you going to say?" My voice drops. "At the beach. When you said 'I—' what were you going to say?"
His jaw tightens. "It doesn't matter."
"It matters to me."
"Yeah? Well, it's too late now, isn't it?" His grip in my hair tightens. "You made your choice. You chose Alexei over me."
"I chose survival!"
"You chose wrong!"
He kisses me.
It's not gentle. Not tender. It's rage and desperation and possession all rolled into one brutal claiming.
