She didn’t fight with her sister. Never. Not about anything important. Oh, they squabbled over TV shows and toys when they were kids, but not since her sister came back from being kidnapped at the age of fifteen. She’d been delicate in a way only Kala could be, and they never normalized. Tonight was the first time she’d told her sister off in years.
It felt good and bad. She loved her sister but their relationship was in flux, and there seemed to be no way to talk about it without seeming like some pathetic hanger on.
But Ben made her feel something else.
“Kenzie, are you all right?” His boots came into view as she stared down at the floor.
The privacy rooms at The Garden were way nicer than the ones at The Hideout, though they were working on it. This particular one was large with a spanking bench and a St. Andrew’s Cross on the wall. There was a bed in the back and a wall full of floggers and whips and rope. He could use those on her and she would float for a while and not think about the storm waiting for her outside this room.
She took a breath. This man had given her something lovely, and he wouldn’t want a sulky sub. She would likely hold on to that moment when he picked her up and whisked her away forever. She lifted her head and gave him her serenest smile. “Yes, Sir. I’m good.”
He stared down at her, his eyes studying her carefully. “I doubt that, but I think we should work this out in another way. Although I should ask. Do you want to talk to your sister?”
Now that it was over, she wished she’d sucked it up and took it like always. It wasn’t anything abnormal. Kala wasn’t a silver-linings girl and never had been. She didn’t want some big rift between them. Life was already opening those chasms. “Not now. I’ll apologize tomorrow. Or later tonight.”
Kala wouldn’t want to fight with her either. A simple apology would reset them.
“What do you need to apologize for?”
Shouldn’t he want to get to the sex? The last thing she expected was that he would want to talk about what happened between her andher sister. He kind of hated her sister, and she didn’t want to deal with it tonight. She didn’t want to think right now. But he’d asked her a direct question, and she was supposed to obey him in this setting unless she chose to end the session.
She didn’t want to end the session.
“I was a little dramatic with my sister earlier,” she explained. “It’s fine. Nothing to worry about.”
His gaze hardened. “I don’t like that word when it comes to you. You don’t create drama. You simply don’t turn away from it. So that means Kala said something and started a fight. I have to wonder if your fight wasn’t about me.”
Was it? “My sister has never appreciated my taste in men. Even when they were boys. It’s nothing against you, but I think my sister would be happier if I fell for someone in our circle. She has trouble trusting people outside of it. It won’t affect us. We’ll just play separately.”
He seemed to consider that for a moment. “So the woman who spends all her time with her family thinks not being able to be around her sister won’t affect us? Or are you thinking we’ll keep it to the club? That wasn’t my plan, by the way.”
“You have a plan?” As far as she knew he was going with the flow.
“I have wants and needs, and neither of them are about limiting my time with you. You do not need to apologize. If I’m correct, she started saying shit and you finally couldn’t handle it anymore. But you weren’t properly dressed and she would have followed you because she’s relentless. Your choices were dealing with her, leaving, or throwing off your clothes and walking out because nudity is allowed on the dungeon floor but street clothes are not. You were magnificent. I like your drama, Kenzie. It makes me feel alive. You make me feel alive.”
Damn him. She wanted to forget everything and concentrate on her body, but he was making that impossible. All his coldness was gone, and she could never resist warm Ben. Warm Ben felt like home. “You make me feel alive, too. Ben, don’t worry about Kala. I won’t let her come between us. Honestly, I don’t think we’ll be working together for much longer. At least not the way we have up until now.”
Yeah, she was starting to think that was part of this awful restlessness she was experiencing. The world was changing, and she had no idea where she would land. Her parents had come back to theAgency to watch over Kala. Oh, they’d included Kenzie in it, but she knew they worried about her twin far more.
Would they retire now? They deserved it.
Tasha was talking babies. She wouldn’t want to roam the world anymore. Cooper and Kala talked about taking over McKay-Taggart since they were legally McKay and Taggart.
“Why would you say that?” Ben asked. “We’ve had no indication anything is changing.”
“She can’t go into the field the way she used to. Not after what happened with Huisman. Her heart…” It was hard to talk about it. She hadn’t been able to be there the first time. Ben had. She’d been hiding. The second time, at least they’d let her stay close. She hadn’t gone into the house where that asshole had held her twin and cousin, but she’d been on the ground. And at the hospital.
How many times had she nearly lost her sisters? She could still remember sitting in Tasha’s hospital room when she was in a coma. She and Kala had held hands and cried. Well, she’d cried. Kala had been her stoic self, but she’d been there for Kenzie.
“So you take over the construct. No one will know,” Ben said.
“I’m not sure if the team will stay together now that Kala’s on the bench.” Kala seemed oddly at peace with it. She would have sworn her sister lived for her job, but Kala was happily running logistics with Cooper and helping Lou and being the voice in Kenzie’s ear. “I think our handlers were always more interested in her.”
“I doubt that.” His hand found her head. “Have I told you what my dick did the minute you walked out of that locker room?”
This was way better. She smiled up at him and felt her nipples tighten because he was looking at them and there was no doubt he liked what he saw. His cock was pressing against his leathers. She wanted her mouth around him, wanted to spend these hours serving this man while he did the same for her.
This was their time.
