Her lips curled up in a secretive smile. “So it wasn’t a good kiss for you?”
“It was awkward. It wasn’t… I suppose I’ve built it up in my head.”
She moved into his space, and his dick responded immediately. “It was rushed, Ben. And it was awkward because I knew Cooper was there and could see us.” She put a hand up. “I don’t love Cooper. I didn’t run after him. I got ready to come and see you, but I couldn’thave this discussion at the club. I can’t ask him to leave.”
Cooper had been there at the end. Cursing him and telling Ben that he wished him luck with her.
She was right. It had been rushed and awkward, and it bothered him that it was their first kiss because he was done playing. He wanted her. He was going to have her, and he didn’t care about the potential fallout.
He’d seen her die. He’d held her body that day in Toronto when Manny kidnapped Maggie and a woman named Carys and her fiancé, Tristan Dean-Miles, and Captain Zach Reed. When the bullets went flying, Manny set off a fail-safe—a bomb meant to take the house down around them. And Ben knew he couldn’t leave Maggie behind.
“Maggie, I want to forget all the reasons why this can’t work.”
She went on her toes and brought her lips close to his, hovering. “Then maybe you’re ready. Kiss me, Ben. See how it feels this time. See how it feels when it’s the right time and the right place and the absolute right woman for you.”
This was what he’d expected. This heady, almost drugged feeling he got when he was close to her, when their bodies brushed together and he could feel her warmth. When he could smell the citrus of her shampoo and her pink hair caressed his cheek.
He followed his instincts, which had gone haywire when they’d kissed earlier, but they were right back online now. He felt electric when his mouth touched hers. He moved this time instead of standing there. He took control because it felt right to do it. She wanted a dominant lover, and damn, but she brought it out in him. One kiss and he was ready to strip her bare and place his mark on her.
His tongue slipped inside her mouth and stroked over hers, and it took everything he had not to come in his freaking slacks.
He stepped back because they were standing right on the street, and no matter how much he wished it wasn’t true, they were still targets for his psycho ex-friend. “Let’s go inside.”
She pulled on his hand when he started leading her in. “Ben, was it different? Was it good?”
Was it good? It was beyond, and he had to deal with it because he was through pretending she wasn’t the be-all, end-all of his existence. “It was perfect.” He leaned over and kissed her again. “It was everything I wanted it to be. Needed it to be, and we need to talk.”
There was the sweetest flush to her face. “Yes, we should talk.”
He led her into the restaurant, hope in his heart for the first time in a long time.
An hour later, Ben wasn’t sure how they’d stayed apart. He felt magnetized around her.
“I don’t remember what happened,” she said, and there was the slightest flush to her cheeks. Like she was embarrassed. Or telling a bit of an untruth. “I woke up in the hospital. I’m still not entirely sure what that man put my body through.”
She was talking about what Manny had done to her mere weeks before. He could still remember seeing her on that fucking medical bed, an IV in her arm and attached to various wires that would give Manny data about her pain. “It was an experimental drug. I think a bit of it survived.” He wasn’t doing this to her. “Maggie, I know some of it survived the fire. That room he held you in wasn’t completely destroyed.”
She seemed to take that news in stride. “So CSIS has it.”
“I’ll do what I can to get you information about it,” he promised.
Her head shook. “Don’t get in trouble. I’ll let my handler know. He’s still got some ties in your world. Ben, if this is going to work, we have to understand that there’s a wall when it comes to our jobs.”
“You don’t want to work with me?” He didn’t like the idea of a wall between them. He wanted nothing between them. Despite the fact that he knew she was being practical, he didn’t want to acknowledge that their agencies, while somewhat friendly, had issues with each other. Relations with the States had frayed years before and were still touchy.
Her hand came out and moved over his. “Of course, I do, and I will whenever possible. But we have to deal with the fact that it might be hard for us to be together. What are you thinking? I’ll be honest, I started off with the deep belief that we would have a couple of filthy, glorious one-night stands and then I would be able to move on. I don’t think I can move on from you.”
He got such a sense of peace when she touched him and spoke sweet words. He felt her caring. Or she was an excellent actress and she was still playing him and he was the dumbest asshole in the history of time because hadn’t he been through this before?
Her hand moved on his forearm, the motion soothing, like he was a predator and she was going to stroke him down from his emotional turn.
“You’re thinking about him,” she said quietly.
“He nearly killed you.” He had some things to admit to her. “I tried to get your medical records.”
“Tristan would have gone in and erased them.” She sat back with a glass of Pinot Noir in her hands. She looked comfortable in the space, like she’d been here many times, and she probably had since the staff had put them in a private dining room. It was one more mystery to solve when it came to the most mysterious woman he’d ever met. “I’m fine. It was terrible and I have some new scars, but I’m okay. I’m cleared for field work and everything.”
“Baby, you need to understand that he knows how I feel about you. I have no idea how.” He was getting paranoid about it, looking for cameras or people hanging around to listen in. It felt like Manny was everywhere.
