“I tried not to accept it when I was younger,” she continued, the words tumbling out now that she'd started. “Fought it through high school and told myself it was just a phase, or confusion, or I don't know, anything but the truth. But midway through college, I finally made peace with it.”
“And you were married and you have kids.”
“It's easier to have kids with your best friend when you love each other, just not romantically, and you both want to build a family together.” Celeste's voice had gone soft, remembering those early conversations with Braden and the plans they'd made. “Braden and I—we gave ourselves a chance at forever, even if it was platonic. The twins were conceived through IVF. We planned every detail and it worked, for a while.”
“Have you ever dated women?”
“A few. In college. Nothing that lasted long enough to be significant.”
Ruby made a noise that sounded suspiciously like a gasp. “So you've essentially been celibate for, what, over a decade?”
Heat flooded Celeste's face at the blunt question and she nodded, unable to look at Ruby.
“You poor thing.”
The silence that followed was heavy. Celeste could feel Ruby watching her and sensed the unspoken questions hovering in the air.
“Why?” Ruby asked finally, her voice gentle. “Why did you choose to live like that?”
The question struck hard and Celeste felt her defenses slam into place, her shoulders stiffening.
“My life decisions have served me well,” she said, the words coming out clipped. “My kids have a father who's present and loves them. I was happy with Braden until he fell in love with Jackson. I have a successful career, a good relationship with my family. I don't regret a single thing.”
“I didn't say you should regret anything.”
“Then why ask?”
“Because—” Ruby paused, clearly choosing her words deliberately. “Because denying who you are for that long... that must've been lonely.”
She blinked hard against the sudden sting in her eyes.
“Since we’re digging into our most well-kept secrets – what about you?” she asked, desperate to shift the focus. “What’s the real reason you’ve been so cagey about your art and this agent?”
Ruby was quiet. When Celeste glanced over, she was staring out the window, jaw tight.
“It's not really anyone's business,” she said.
“Fair enough.”
“But” Ruby sighed, turning to face Celeste again. “A lot has happened since I left Cheyenne Valley. A lot I'm not proud of.”
Celeste waited, giving her space.
“I was so cocky in high school,” Ruby continued. “Felt like the world was at my feet, you know? Everything came so easily and I never had to work hard or to struggle. I thought that meant I was special. Destined for greatness.”
She laughed, but it was hollow.
“Then I went to college and—” Ruby's voice cracked slightly. “I had a complete mental health crisis. Everything that had come easily before suddenly didn't. I was surrounded by people just as smart as me, just as talented. And I didn't know how to handle not being the best anymore.”
“Ruby…”
“I pushed myself too hard, stopped sleeping and eating properly. Began having panic attacks in the middle of classes. Eventually I ended up in the hospital due to dehydration and exhaustion. They kept me for three days.” Her hands twisted in her lap. “My mother was terrified and my brother dropped everything to come stay with me. And I just felt like such a failure.”
Celeste's chest ached. She wanted to reach over, to take Ruby's hand and offer some kind of comfort. But she kept her grip on the wheel.
“That's when I learned about limitations. About being human instead of superhuman and the fact that talent isn't enough. You need resilience and coping mechanisms, specifically the ability to fail without falling apart.”
“That sounds like wisdom, not failure.”
