I gazed at him and he kissed me. All my senses sprang into life like a jack-in-the-box bursting open. It felt as though all my nerve endings were tingling and my hair was standing on end. I could smell the hospital soap on Harry’s skin, and feel the heat of his breath on my face. I’d kissed boys – men – before of course, but never like this. My head was spinning and I thought Harry felt the same way because when we broke apart he looked quite dazed.
‘Blimey, Elsie,’ he said. ‘Blimey.’
He kissed me again, for a long time. At some point – I wasn’t sure when – we sat down again and we kissed until we were both lying down on the pile of soft blankets, Harry’s weight on top of me. Until he suddenly sat up. ‘We should, erm, stop,’ he muttered, adjusting his top self-consciously. ‘Sorry. I didn’t mean to. You know.’
I chuckled at him being so flustered. ‘It’s fine,’ I said. ‘Honestly.’ I sat up too and ran my fingers through his tousled hair. ‘You’re going away again tomorrow, and that means we might never get the chance to be together again.’
Harry touched his nose to mine. ‘Not if I have anything to do with it.’
‘But, Harry, you might not have anything to do with it. That’s the awful, horrible thing.’
‘I know.’ He rested his forehead on mine and we gazed at one another. I thought I could stay there, looking into his eyes, forever. I took a breath.
‘Let’s not stop,’ I said, almost unable to believe what I was saying. ‘Let’s not.’
‘Are you sure?’
‘If you are?’
‘I’ve never been more sure of anything in my whole life.’
*
Much later, I realised someone might be missing Harry.
‘The Red Cross nurses think you’ve gone for a walk and you’ve been ages,’ I said. ‘You really should go.’
‘I suppose you’re right.’ Harry sounded reluctant. He sat up and pulled on his shirt. ‘You will write to me, won’t you?’
‘Of course I will. It’s really the only way I know how to communicate with you.’
Harry chuckled and I was pleased. I liked making him laugh.
‘What time are you leaving tomorrow?’
He shrugged. ‘They’ll just come and get me when they’re ready.’
I felt a hard knot of despair settle in my gut. ‘I’ll miss you.’
Harry leaned over and kissed me again. ‘I’ll miss you too, Sunshine.’
A sudden noise from the door made us spring apart. ‘What was that?’ I said. I looked over and thought I saw a face at the little window. ‘Was someone there?’
Harry held his finger up, telling me to be quiet and we both stayed silent, listening. Eventually he shook his head. ‘Must have just been someone walking past,’ he said. ‘Nothing to worry about.’
‘You go first and I’ll follow,’ I said. ‘We can’t leave together.’
We kissed again and Harry went towards the door, pausing with his fingers on the handle, looking away from me. ‘I’m not going to turn round because if I see your face now, I might never go,’ he said. ‘And then there would be a whole court martial thing, and I’d probably get shot, and it would be a big old mess.’
I laughed. ‘Please don’t do that then.’
‘I just want you to know that today has been the best day of my whole life, no question. And I’m going to see you again, Elsie. I promise. You’re my sunshine.’
He opened the door and he was gone, just like that.
I sat there for a while, wondering if I’d dreamt that perfect afternoon. Then I gathered all my things – my bag and coat – and let myself out of the boiler room. I had to get changed into my uniform, I thought, and visit Nelly and obviously I had to go and start my shift, and then … ‘Oh,’ I said as I walked round the corner and came face to face with Jackson. ‘Lord you made me jump.’
He gave me a strange sort of wolfish smile. ‘What are you doing down here?’ he asked. ‘Down here in the basement?’
