I shook my head. ‘My matron swapped my shifts around. I’m back tomorrow.’
‘I’m glad.’ She looked at me with her head tilted to one side. ‘You need rest.’
‘I know.’
‘You can go in. She’s still sedated but Doctor Gilligan said he’s upped her pain relief so we might be able to bring her round tomorrow.’
‘That’s wonderful news.’
‘There’s still a long road ahead,’ Matron warned. ‘You know the odds.’
I did. I knew that patients as badly burned as Nelly rarely survived. But I wanted to have a little bit of hope.
‘I understand.’ I shifted the bag from one hand to the other because it was getting heavy. ‘I won’t stay long.’
This time I was prepared for the sight of Nelly, of course, but it was still a shock to see her there on the bed, swathed in bandages. I drew my breath in sharply.
‘Hello again,’ I said, forcing myself to speak cheerily though my voice shook a little. ‘Still asleep, are you? You’ve always loved a bit of shut-eye.’
I glanced at Nelly but she didn’t move, other than the rhythmic rise and fall of her chest.
‘I brought some things for you.’ I put the bag on to the chair next to the bed, and began unpacking, talking Nelly through everything.
‘Here’s the photograph of your mum and dad from your bedroom,’ I said, popping it on to the cabinet. ‘They look very stern, I think. Probably they’re saying, “What were you doingprancing about the garden in an air raid, Nelly Malone?” That’s what my parents would say, if they were here.’
I rubbed my throat, trying to steady my voice, which was high-pitched and croaky. ‘Mrs Gold made me bring you a nightie, bless her. I’ll put it in your cupboard and when you get those bandages off it’ll be ready for you.’
I opened the little cabinet and shoved the nightgown inside, not wanting to think about how long it could be before Nelly wore it. ‘She’s been ever so good, Mrs Gold. She’s such a nice person, don’t you think?’ I left a pause for her to reply, but obviously, Nelly stayed silent. ‘She’s a diamond; that’s what my dad would have said. Mrs Gold, a diamond.’ I tried to laugh at my weak joke but somehow it came out sounding more like a sob.
‘I’m working tomorrow, so I’ll come and see you when I can,’ I said hurriedly. ‘Hope you have a good night.’
I put the empty bag under the bed safely out of the way. ‘You’ll need this when you come home again,’ I said firmly. ‘To carry all the bits and pieces I’ve brought you back again.’
I paused by the door and blew her a kiss, then left the room, feeling guilty that I couldn’t do more to help her. I was a nurse, for heaven’s sake. And yet I felt so helpless.
Chapter 22
I felt better after a night’s sleep. Desperately worried about Nelly, of course, but more able to deal with it all. Mr Gold had sent a telegram to her mother in Ireland and he’d told me he had the car from work for as long as he needed it so he would drive me wherever I needed to go. He was being so kind, just like Mrs Gold was. But when I said as much to Mrs Gold, as I got ready for work the next morning, she pooh-poohed my sentimentality.
‘Where I come from, people help each other out,’ she said. ‘It’s just what we do. I think Londoners are no different. You helped me, now I help you.’
‘Where are you from?’ I asked curiously, but she didn’t answer. Instead, she put her hands on my shoulders and looked at me.
‘Are you sure you’re up to going to work?’
I honestly wasn’t sure. I’d been a nervous wreck when the bombs had started falling, but Mrs Gold had tucked me into my bunk tightly, like I was a little girl, and she and Mr Gold had stayed awake in the shelter, playing cards and talking quietly between themselves, until I fell asleep. I’d been so tired that I hadn’t even woken with the thuds and wails of the raid, except once, when I turned over on the hard bunk and half-woke. But even then I must have still been dozing, because though I couldhear the Golds chatting in low voices, I couldn’t understand what they were saying.
Now though, I felt a bit stronger. I was glad I was on daytime shifts for now so I didn’t have to cope with a raidandpatients, and I was keen to see Nelly. So even though I was nervous about going back to the wards, I nodded.
‘I’m fine.’
‘Good girl,’ said Mrs Gold, like my mother always used to. It made me laugh because I was not a girl, and she was really only a few years older than I was.
‘Are you going to work?’ I asked. ‘Will you be all right, with your head?’ She was dressed for the office in a neat suit and shoes that I wouldn’t be able to walk in. She even had stockings on – sheer shiny nylons that were very different from the thick woolly monstrosities I wore under my uniform.
‘I’ll be fine,’ she said, touching her hand to the plaster on her forehead. ‘This is nothing, really and Albert has the car, so he can drive us.’
‘Be careful,’ I warned.
