“You know,” he said hesitantly. “Between the two of us, we have two very lucky kids. Imagine how much luckier they’d be with two parents who actually loved them and wanted to be with them.”
For a moment, it didn’t quite register what he was saying, but when it did, she immediately stopped walking. Connor calmly paused and turned to face her. His expression completely serene—like he hadn’t just dropped a huge bombshell.
“Connor, what are you…?”
“Think about it,” he whispered as he gently grasped her shoulders. “We’re not strangers, and since we reconnected, it’s still there. Everything we felt as kids—it’s there. We missed our chance all those years ago, and I take full responsibility for it.”
She let out a shaky breath but couldn’t seem to form any words to reply.
“I see the way you are with Annabeth, and it makes my heart ache for her because she’s never known that kind of love. A mother’s love. And I’m crazy about Jonah,” he went on. “We’re living these separate yet connected lives, and I don’t want the separate part anymore.”
“Anymore? Connor, it’s been like…a month!”
“No, it’s been years, and you know it,” he gently reminded her. “We were forced to hit pause, but now that we’re here again, I don’t want to wait. I look at you and I see my future. Our family. I want all the things we should have already had.”
Tears stung her eyes, and she was shaking. He was saying all the right things, all the things she occasionally let herself fantasize about. But…
“We were just supposed to be testing the waters today, and now you’re talking about…about…”
“Lexi, I love you, and I think you love me too. We could have an amazing life, the four of us. Or…more than four of us.” Reaching up, he cupped her face, and all the emotion—the urgency, the need, the love—was right there in his eyes. “Why do we want to keep taking it slow when we’ve already lost so much time?”
She had no actual answer for that other than it was happening so fast, but…was it? They weren’t strangers; they knew each other better than most couples did, so…why was she hesitating?
Because I’m afraid of getting hurt again…
And there it was.
They might be older and wiser and all that crap, but there was one factor that hadn’t been considered.
His family.
Did she believe they were suddenly less snobby and ready to accept her with open arms?
Not even a little bit.
They had carefully avoided that topic, but it was always there in the back of her mind.
“Say something,” he urged, his hands still warm on her face.
Reaching up, she placed her hands over his before gently grasping his wrists. “You have no idea how much I want to say yes and just…just take that leap of faith.”
“But…” And the disappointment was palpable.
“But…can we please just go and sit with the kids and take this one step at a time?” Pausing, she shook her head. “Everything you just said is so wonderful and makes my heart so damn happy, but…this was just supposed to be us testing the waters. I know this isn’t the response you wanted, but…”
“No,” he whispered before placing a soft kiss on her lips. “But I understand what you’re saying. I just couldn’t keep it to myself anymore. I wanted you to know how I felt and where I saw us going. And if you’re not ready, it’s okay. I can wait.”
Her heart literally ached at his admission.
“Thank you.”
Stepping aside, he put his arm around her as they resumed their walk to the playground. When they came around the bend, she could hear Jonah shrieking with pure joy, and when they could see what was going on, she saw her son chasing Annabeth around the jungle gym. It was sweet that Annabeth was running slower so he could almost catch her.
We could have an amazing life, the four of us.
Yes, we could, she thought. These would be our kids. And we could have more.
She thought of the conversation she had with Kelsey the day they moved into the resort about how she always wished she could have more kids so Jonah wouldn’t be alone.
