Was I honest? Not completely. Maybe I should tell her.
I glanced at her once more, at those sparkling eyes and the freckles that danced on her nose as she laughed at Ventura’s comedy skills, and it made me linger.
She noticed and turned her head. Something inside me shifted. All of a sudden, I felt... tired. Exhausted of these feelings. Longing, but never taking. Always craving and never reaching. And the undeniable truth was that it washerI craved more than anything. But since I wasn’t an idiot—or an asshole—I knew we had no future. I had no right to start something I didn’t have the decency to see through. And it was frustrating. Maddening. Overwhelming.
I let my head fall back against the cushion, my face crumpling. Hazel’s expression softened. Involuntarily, my head dipped just a little, as if her lips were the mothership calling me home.
I didn’t mutter a word. But she knew. I saw it in her eyes how hard it was getting for both of us. Her gaze flickered to my lips before she whispered, “...but you don’t need this,” continuing our conversation as if we hadn’t just exchanged an entire world of emotions.
“I don’t need this,” I whispered, my voice low as her eyes told me everything her words denied, “...relationship-love crap.” I was aching to touch her. She swallowed hard, and every muscle in my body tensed, waiting for relief, but my mind clung to its last thread of logic and sense.
“Because you don’t believe in it,” she said, her cheek twitching as if she had bitten it from the inside.
Hazel, stop. Before it’s too late.
But her body didn’t care, just like mine.
“Because I don’t believe in it,” I echoed. It was mind-blowing how much was at stake here. This moment, suspended between desire and consequence. A moment where I could lean in and trace the contours of her face, turning longing into reality, or take one step forward and plummet into the abyss and crash.
“Which means whatever happens here... stays here,” she said, and my heart started pounding. Banging my ribcage from within.
“Here? On this trip?” I asked, leaning in slowly as I reached for a strand of her soft hair and twirled it around my finger, knowing exactly how much it would take to make her move. “On this couch?”
She rested her head against the cushion, exposing the delicate curve of her jawline. My gaze roamed her face as my fingers traced the line of her neck, gliding to her collarbone. A small breath hissed through her nose, and her pupils dilated in pleasure.
“It can stay on the couch, yes,” she whispered. Our mouths hovered just inches apart. The only thing I felt was her breath, warm and tempting against my skin. My self-control was as thin as a glass noodle—until it snapped. And I just gave up.
On my own expectations. On what I should do and what I shouldn’t feel.
“If you say so,” I murmured, before softly crashing into her. I couldn’t help myself anymore. My lips, tender but firm, pressed against hers the moment she opened her mouth, and the world inside me exploded. Every good intention, every moment of restraint disappeared.
Her breath came in heavy gasps, mirroring my own, indicating she was affected by this as much as I was. She feltso damn good. Like I’ve wanted this for much longer than just a week. Months, even.
My hand slid to the back of her head, fingers sinking into her hair as I kissed her deeper. She moaned, and somewhere between her lips and that sound, my groin had an existential meltdown, making me wonder if I had ever felt pleasure like this before. I tried to control my impulses so as not to hurt her physically. That’s how bad I was for her.
I forced myself to pull away just for a second, trying to contain the rush of emotions threatening to consume me, but she took the moment to pause for a beat longer. I pressed my forehead to hers, and Hazel’s eyes shot closed, grounding us both. I don’t think I’ve ever had a kiss such as this one. She brought her fingers to her lips as if savoring the moment. It was my sign to let her breathe, but I didn’t let her go. And God, I prayed she wouldn’t ask me to. I didn’t know if I had the willpower. I hoped she would ignore the warning signs saying this was a bad idea, just like I did.
My palm covered her burning cheek, which was as red as her bruised lips. Finally, she opened her eyes, and there was something unreadable in those beautiful blue oceans of hers.
“Luke, if... if this is some kind of early birthday gift, I don’t need any favors. I don’t want anyone feeling sorry for me,” she said, lowering her gaze.
“Hazel.” Her name tasted like smooth caramel on my tongue. Her intrusive thoughts tried to win, but I refused to accept that. I shifted, cupping her face in both hands. She raised her eyes to mine, and I saw fear. Fear that someone might pretend to want her.
“You have no idea. No idea,” I breathed out desperately wanting to show her everything I felt but couldn’t put in words. My thumb brushed over her bottom lip. And this time I didn’t wait for permission. I leaned in and kissed her. Hard. With no space between our lips. No space for doubt. And as soon as I felt her body pushing against me, I was a lost man.
I was aching for her. For days, weeks now, I knew she had infiltrated my life somehow. I didn’t know what the future looked like for us, but I knew for damn sure she was in my blood now, and there was no way of getting rid of her.
I pulled her closer, her warmth searing against my skin. But it wasn’t enough. It would never be enough. My tongue enteredher mouth, drawing another moan from her. It was agonizing. The position on the ground was a bit awkward, so I grabbed her waist and, with a swift move, lifted her onto me, her knees straddling me. I pressed her against me, one hand gripping her nape, the other on her ass, separated only by the flimsy material of her shorts, which I could have ripped off with a single tug.
I held her tight as she tried to move, seeking more pressure, the undeniable bulge in my shorts heightening the tension. Her hands slipped beneath my shirt, nails leaving trails of fire along my skin, and I pulled it off before I could think. My mouth traveled to her neck, and her fingers tangled in my hair as my tongue spelled out the alphabet on her hot flesh.
“God, Hazel, I’ve wanted to kiss you for so long,” I breathed, hands greedy for every inch of her.
She laughed breathlessly. “Are you sure?” Her words made me slow down, which was funny because I thought even a hurricane couldn’t pull me away from her. I lifted my gaze. She was still catching her breath.
“You don’t believe me?” My lips brushed against hers, barely touching her.
“I do. I know I’m not bad-looking, just... not your usual type.” I squeezed her hips, pressing her into me. Hazel moaned softly, her eyes fluttering shut.
