Eli stops again, ripping me downward and grabbing my head. I’m plucked straight from my toxic mind. His thumbs nearly puncture my skull with the grip he has on me, his eyes gleaming black in the distorted light of the passage.
He presses his mouth to mine. My chest expands with the air he forces inside,hisair, refilling me. And with another hard shove off the wall, we’re swimming again. I kick my feet, determined to help, to get us out.
But his hands slip from my hips, no attempt to scrabble back around me.
And I’m on my own with nothing but two lungs full of air.
No no no. I can’t swim. Heknowsthis.
I kick and thrash, attempting to turn my body around. But why? Only dark water looks back at me, taunts me, suffocates me. He can’t die, but that doesn’t mean he won’t feel the unimaginable surrendering—a breath of water. My fingernails curl at the thought. Please tell me I didn’t do this.
Where are you, Eli?
What if I scream? What if I use the last of my air to make enough underwater noise to lead him to me? Then I could succumb to the pull of death while in his arms. I could squeeze him tight while my body ceases to function, while my heart gives out. And then what? He can have my essence? Be cured of his broken immortality? Live forever in this fucked-up world? And what about Kelt? Did he make it out?
A vision drowns my mind, the questions submerged in liquid, asphyxiated.
A dim light hugs Eli’s body as he drifts farther away, one hand left extended. Toward me. And his eyes… no. Wide open, pure white. No depth, no recognition. Nothing.
I blink, my lashes weighed down with water drops. The passage comes into view, the floor and walls slick with mud. I breathe. Air. I’m actually breathing. I rise slowly and pull my sodden shirt down to coverme with a shiver. It clings to my muddy skin. Where is he? What happened?
I shove the hair from my face as I walk toward the faint light in the distance, checking room after room and peering down passages. Vacant. Desolate. I assemble the strength to run. I have to find him. And Kelt. And get out of this nightmare.
But something catches my eye. I retrace my steps, stopping in the doorway of a small room, empty save for the little boy balled-up in the corner.
Chapter 38
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It’s him. The boy from the Calderan forest. From my visions. From shadows. He’s not running away, for once.
And he’s not real.
Like Cam.
I turn to go, but he speaks.
“Wait, please.”
I stop. This wouldn’t be the first time I indulged in insanity.
“I don’t want to be alone anymore,” he says.
I understand that. Of course I do. He’s the making of my own mind. I wring my hands, committing to the madness. “What are you doing here?”
Those familiar eyes look at me, their pain too great for such a small body. His hands grip his knees, covering the holes worn into his black pants. Water drips from the gathered ankles onto his muddy bare feet. Drops roll to the floor. “Zandrite found me in the woods days ago. He said he wanted me for his collection.”
“He locked you up?”
The boy stands and squeezes the water from his shirt, also black. “Yes, behind bars taller than me, but I escaped over the top of them when the room filled with water. Then I swam and swam. I thought I was going to drown until it suddenly went back down. And I ended up here.”
I might as well get answers before my mind sends him running again. “Who are you?”
“Atom.” He scrunches that freckled nose. “I think we should go.”
“You’re not real.”
“Okay.” He shrugs.
