“For fucks’s sake.” Lena slaps my back. Gently. Wary of hurting me even when she’s pissed. “Don’t ever do that again. Promise me.”
I kiss a line down her neck, savoring the way she tips her head back, granting me access. “No chance.”
“That’s not fair.” She’s getting breathless, her eyes drifting shut as I dip my tongue into the hollow at the base of her throat. “I can’t keep worrying you’re going to do something stupid just to protect me.”
I nip her skin, drawing Lena up short, and wait until her eyes are focused on mine. She needs to hear this. To understand. “Nothing about protecting you will ever be stupid. It’s my job, my purpose, my reason for living, from now until the day I die.”
“And what if that comes too soon, because of me?” Trepidation tightens her features. “What am I supposed to do if you get seriously hurt—or worse—because of me? Do you honestlythink I could survive that? I can’t live that way. Won’t live that way. You can’t ask me to.”
My tension boomerangs back, my muscles locking beneath Lena’s sweet weight, my fingers digging into her curves. “You’re not leaving.”
“And you’re not telling me what to do.”
My wife and I glare at each other, emotions electrifying the room. Lena, my defiant one, the strong one, is the first to break our standoff. “I love you. It’s my right to fight for you, protect you, just as you would do for me. You can’t stop me from doing that any more than I can stop you.”
Fuck, I love this infuriating woman.“Then what are we going to do? Being part of this family means accepting a certain level of risk. Our war with the Paganos is coming to an end; Aldo’s confirmed that we’re close to eradicating them from the city once and for all. But there will always be another villain, another enemy who wants to hurt us. Who will want to hurtyouto get to me. You can’t possibly expect me to stand by and do nothing.”
“Of course not.” Lena tunnels her fingers through my hair. “But I expect you to be honest with me when things are getting dangerous. To not hide your plans from me, especially when you think I won’t agree with them. To not coddle me or keep me locked away just because you think it’s the safer option.”
“You’re asking an awful lot, little one.”
Lena massages her fingers against my scalp, and I have to force myself not to melt under her touch. “All I’m asking is for you to trust me. To acknowledge that I’m living this life with you, am a major part of this family with you, and I deserve to know what’s going on. Deserve to make my own decisions about my safety.” I start to protest but she ignores me, carrying on calmly.
“I’m asking you to trust that, when it comes to the dark side of life in the Cerreti family, I’ll defer to your expertise. I won’ttake unnecessary risks. And if you tell me to do something for my safety and the safety of any children we might have in the future, I need you to trust that I’ll do as you say.”
The mention of children does something wild to my organs. Sets my heart beating in an entirely new way.
Lena’s rendered me mute, and she presses her advantage. “One other thing—you need to teach me some real self-defense moves. You know, just in case. Just handing me a knife isn’t going to cut it.”
She’s right. I hate it, but of course she is. And if it means I get to keep her, I’ll agree to anything. “Vaffanculo, I’m getting gray hair just talking about this. You’re going to be the death of me,piccolina.”
I can’t stop myself from smiling when Lena understands my answer for what it is: a concession to her terms.
She gives my hair a tug. “I’ve always thought men with salt-and-pepper hair are very sexy.”
“Men?” I nip her neck again, loving the way her pulse kicks beneath my lips. The way goosebumps bloom across her skin when I slide my hands underneath her dress.
“Just one.” Lena lifts my face, undoing me with her look of love and devotion and desire. “Only ever one. Only ever you.”
44
EPILOGUE - LENA
TWO MONTHS LATER
Ismooth down the navy silk skirt one more time, making sure the fabric sits just right. Give the white sweater one more tug. They are more gifts from my husband.
“You’re perfect,bella.”
I meet Rem’s eyes in the mirror. “I’m nervous.”
“That’s totally normal, but you have no reason to be.” Strong arms wrap around me from behind. I lean against his hard chest, dragging the smell of him deep into my lungs. It calms me as much as it excites me. His lips brush the shell of my ear. “You’ve been practicing for weeks. The piece is flawless. You’re going to ace the audition.”
True to his word, Rem persuaded the higher-ups at the symphony to give me an audition. He was so determined that I have enough time to practice that he took over all the planning for Aunt Mabel’s memorial service, mastering to-do lists and following up on the tiniest details, making sure everything came together flawlessly.
We held it at the little church in my aunt’s town. Rem held my hand as neighbors and friends shared their memories of Mabel, never leaving my side as they filled me in on what animperfectly wonderful woman she was. Bianca fed everyone the most comforting food and the memorial was nothing less than a joyous, bittersweet celebration of my aunt’s life. The only thing that would’ve made it better is if she’d been there to join in.
Aldo even made a brief appearance. Our relationship is…a work in progress. The second DNA tests have come back conclusive: I am his biological daughter. It’s something I haven’t wrapped my head around but, in a move that I’m sure is entirely un-Aldo, he’s agreed to take everything at my speed. We’re getting to know each other slowly, with his adopted nephew by my side.
