My eyes lifted to his. “Then why are you here?”
He looked down at me, his mask slipping into a blank expression as his eyes bored into me. “Because I want to be here. With you.”
My soul leaped.
“Please,” he said, his tail gently touching my tense one before flicking away, “Don’t be stressed or fearful of me. You’re always so uncomfortable, and I don’t mean to make you so.”
“You always tell that story,” I replied. “Why wouldn’t I be uncomfortable? I vomited on you, Commander.”
A breathy laugh slipped out of him, and my shoulders relaxed once again. He said, “A mistake on my part, and I did promise not to tell it again. So please, Wyn.”
“I can try.”
Monqilcolnen smiled, a bright one, and his whole aspect changed, making him lighter. He practically glowed, stealing my breath and sending my soul pounding. He whispered, his voice deep, “That’s all I can ask.”
I wanted to ask if he was always so calm, or if it was a front he presented. And if the latter, what did he battle on a daily basis that required such a mask?
I shifted a sleeping Bobbinvoxlyn once again. It hadn’t taken long for the kit to fall deep asleep as Monqilcolnen and I walked around the atrium. The commander hadn’t pressed me for conversation, and yet the silence hadn’t felt as oppressive as usual. Things were calming between the two of us, I hoped. Eventually, my hope was that I no longer dreaded working with him, nor the inevitable blaster classes, which would resume as soon as soon as my hand healed. But I’d have to see.
Pacing the corridor, I patted Bobbinvoxlyn’s butt as he slept soundly in my arms, cheek resting on my shoulder. According to Edith, Seth and Kalvoxrencol were asleep, and I loathed to wake them when they hadn’t been sleeping well, but I couldn’t take the kit back to my berth. There was always someone about, and they would wake Bobbinvoxlyn, who would probably start crying again. I had pinged for Prince Serlotminden and Bartholomew, even though it had made my stomach curl in discomfort, but they’d been unavailable—probably fucking. Talvax was on Command, and Urgg was in their bakery.
There was nowhere else to take the kit, but it felt as if my arm was about to fall off. The muscles were burning, and my injured hand cramped anytime I attempted to settle his weight on thatarm. My eyes flicked to Commander Monqilcolnen’s office for the millionth time.
“He is in his office,” Edith commented from the monitor across from me. Clearly, she was blatantly ignoring Monqilcolnen’s lecture about invading theAdmiral Ven’ssystems. She wasn’t even trying to hide it.
“I’m aware. You have told me at least three times.”
“It has been five times precisely,” she replied.
“Because that makes it better?”
Edith chuckled, head bouncing. “He’s unlikely to bite, unless you want him to.”
I gasped. “Edith.”
Her laughter grew louder. “What?”
“We are not like… that, nor have we even discussed acquaintance permissions.” Though perhaps we should. My thoughts went back to me dragging my finger over his face, him gently touching my hand, his tail touching mine. My soul sped up. We should discuss them, so such things didn’t happen again, then my soul wouldn’t pound and that odd electricity wouldn’t spread through my veins, confusing me.
“So discuss them,” she replied.
“Edith.”
“What?” she asked again. “It seems reasonable. Besides, at this moment, there’s nowhere else to take Bob. He can nap in Commander Monqilcolnen’s office or his quarters. You don’t even have to ask. You have access to his system, therefore you can enter whenever you wish.”
While accurate, that felt like an invasion of his privacy. I couldn’t do that. Also, what would Monqilcolnen think if he came to his quarters and found me there? My gut curled in discomfort at the thought. He might think I was attempting to initiate something casual between us. I might be perfectly finewith casual fucking, but I wouldn’t do it with someone of his station or with a superior officer.
“What are your choices?” she asked. “I can wake up Seth or you can ask Monqilcolnen for the use of his quarters.”
There was no choice. I headed down the corridor to his office and palmed the door open.
Monqilcolnen looked up from his desk and his tail paused stock still before twisting. Standing, he asked, “Wyn, is everything well?”
“I’m fine.”
“Then why do you still have Bobbinvoxlyn?”
I shifted the kit again, my arm screaming. What did Kalvoxrencol and Seth feed this child? He was like a rock in my grasp. I paused. Was that why Barusians referred to their children as rocks? Possibly. Bobbinvoxlyn certainly resembled one at this exact moment.
