Monqilcolnen hadn’t spoken since he’d woken up the first time and fucked me. We hadn’t had sex again, which I understood. He was deep in the waves of grief. His cousins had come in and tried to speak to him, but he wouldn’t respond no matter what they said. Hallonnixmin and Dontilvynsan had pinged, multiple times, as well; still, Monqilcolnen remained quiet. Then Emperor Kontolmakqilnen and Empress Vyn had pinged, and Monqilcolnen had just pressed closer to me, face buried in my stomach. I had been mortified about my lack of dress, but I’d pushed through, and truthfully, neither of them seemed to even notice, let alone care.
He hadn’t left the bedroom.
I was sitting on our bed working, and Monqilcolnen was lying in between my legs, his head on my thigh, arms hugging me, and tail coiled around mine. Cincin was pressed against his side. She absolutely hated the shared space being taken over by strangers and had refused to leave the bedroom, choosing to stay beside Monqilcolnen unless I was feeding her.
While I worked through the new issues that were popping up at an almost daily rate, I brushed Monqilcolnen’s hair in a small attempt to soothe him. I wished I could do more. I knew nothing of families, nor did I know anything about the grief of losing your parents. My own grief was far smaller, and I hardly knew how to speak of it.
He let out a deep breath, then nuzzled me. I pulled Monqilcolnen closer, so he knew I wasn’t mad. I didn’t care in the slightest about him scent marking me almost all of the time. Part of me wanted to tell him I considered him my mate because it might ease his stress of being alone. Then again, it might not, especially if he didn’t feel the same.
I didn’t want to add to his stress.
The bedroom door opened, and Monqilcolnen curled closer to me, hiding his face completely. He had deferred most choices to me, which I was fine with. Whatever he needed, I would provide. At first it had been odd to interact on a more personal or equal level with his cousins. None of them cared and had told me so.
Serlotminden came in, and I wasn’t surprised—he and Kalvoxrencol had been taking turns, so as to not overwhelm Monqilcolnen.
“Monqilcolnen,” he said, and Monqilcolnen pressed tighter to me.
I cupped the nape of his neck and said, “Yes… Serlotminden?” I swallowed the uncomfortable curl in my stomach from the lack of formalities.
“Hallonnixmin pinged me.”
“And?”
“It’s all arranged.”
I closed my eyes. The send off. Monqilcolnen was their only child—it was his job to spread their ashes among the stars, but he couldn’t.
Monqilcolnen whimpered, and I tightened my hold. Serlotminden moved as if he intended to join us on the bed, but he tensed and stopped at the last second, probably because I bared my lips in a silent snarl. I wouldn’t suffer anyone near my mate right now.
“Who is sending them off?” I asked.
“Hallonnixmin will.”
I brushed a hand through Monqilcolnen’s hair. “Can we honor them here?”
“Kalvoxrencol is organizing something as we speak. It will be tomorrow.”
“Thank you.”
Serlotminden shook his head, his eyes running over Monqilcolnen. “Thank you, Wyn.”
When the door closed, I bent over Monqilcolnen, hugging him. “Did you hear that, Star?”
He pressed against me.
I kissed his shoulder. “Hallonnixmin will honor them. You know he will.”
Monqilcolnen did not say anything, and I wasn’t surprised. He was deep in his grief. Getting him to eat was near impossible. He hadn’t taken a shower since he’d found out. I was scared—very scared—he was starting to succumb to the grief.
I had even contacted Doctor Qinlin about it. She’d promised to monitor him, but with intermittent communications and failing systems, Monqilcolnen wasn’t her priority. She’d told me to not leave his side, which I wouldn’t. Not ever.
Pressing another kiss to his scales, I asked, “Will you let me take care of you?”
Monqilcolnen kissed my thigh, and I smiled.
“Thank you, Star.”
I gently slid out from beneath him and ignored his subsequent whimper. Cupping his cheeks, I brushed my lips against his, then pulled him to his feet and led him to the bathroom.
