Gavin looked up, eyebrows raised. "Bad day?"
"Your alpha is insufferable," I grumbled, kicking off my shoes with more force than necessary. They thunked against the wall.
"Yeah, tell me something I don't know." Gavin snorted. "He's your alpha now too, you know."
I plopped down at the kitchen table as Gavin brought the food over. "He was glowering at some poor guy at the fundraiser like he was about to shift right there in the middle of the parking lot."
Gavin passed me a container of kung pao chicken. I popped it open and shoved a huge bite into my mouth so I wouldn't have to say anything else.
For a few minutes, the only sounds were the scrape of forks against takeout containers. But Gavin studied me way too intently.
Finally, he spoke. "So, what's really going on?"
I chewed slowly, stalling. Nathan's heated gaze and possessive words echoed in my mind. The way he'd looked at me...
I swallowed. "Nothing."
"Mm-hmm." Gavin's hum told me he didn't believe that for asecond.
We ate in silence for a bit longer. Then Gavin, too casually, mentioned, "I talked to Nathan today."
My fork paused halfway to my mouth as I glared at my brother. Mysoannoying brother. "Why do you keep bringing him up?"
Gavin shrugged. "I always talk about Nathan. He's my alpha. My best friend."
Huh. He was right. Gavin had always talked about Nathan. Pack business, funny stories, the latest town gossip. But now, every time Nathan's name came up, my stomach clenched, and my pulse raced.
It was too much. I couldn't sit here discussing Nathan for one more second, or I might combust. I stood abruptly, my chair scraping against the floor. "I'm going to bed."
"Okay, okay." Gavin raised his hands in surrender, but there was a slightly odd expression on his face. "Night, sis."
"Night," I mumbled. Then I escaped to my room before he could say another word.
Once my door shut safely behind me, I exhaled and leaned against it. Getit together, I ordered myself. Nathan is just another alpha. An annoyingly overprotective, aggravating, entrancing...
"Ugh!" I smacked my head back against the door. I was so screwed. No matter how much I tried to convince myself that I felt nothing for Nathan beyond pack loyalty and maybe some begrudging respect, my stupid freaking heart knew better.
But I couldn't let myself fall for him. I wouldn't. I'd already lost too much. I refused to risk that kind of pain again, especially not for an alpha who would never want a damaged female like me.
No, it was better to keep my distance, keep things professional even if every instinct urged me closer to Nathan. Even if his woodsy, intoxicating scent lingered in my nose.
I pushed off the door and began getting ready for bed, determined to put the infuriating alpha out of my mind. I just hoped I'd have better luck with that tomorrow.
I collapsed onto my bed, exhausted but too wired to sleep. Nathan's words echoed in my head, a taunting loop I couldn't shut off.
He's not good enough for you.
Igripped my pillow. "I am not doing this," I growled. "I am not letting myself fall for him."
My wolf stirred inside me, radiating disagreement. She wanted to seek out our mate, to bask in his strength, and let him chase away the ghosts of our past. But I couldn't. I wouldn't.
"I don't care if he's my mate," I told her firmly. "Irefuseto get hurt again."
Damn it all to hell. I was fighting a losing battle. Despite my best efforts, I could still remember the way Nathan smelled when he stood behind me today. Warm and woodsy and utterly male. It made my mouth water and my thighs clench.
Damn him. Damn biology. Damn my traitorous heart.
Chapter 8
